This Low-Key Lakeside Wedding Is a Breath of Fresh Air
“When dating, I was meeting people who weren’t ‘it,’ and I wanted to clarify what ‘it’ was for me,” says Daisy, who lives in Duluth, Minnesota. So, she created a note on her phone with 17 things she was looking for, like ‘emotionally available’ and ‘lives a joyful life’ and ‘can start a fire or change a tire.’ She met Ted in 2019 and said that she manifested him. They got married in July 2021 on Lake Superior. Here, Daisy talks about Goodwill wedding decor and a joke in her vows that people told her not to make…
“During the pandemic, we had date nights where we dressed up, cooked a nice dinner, drank wine, and danced around our apartment. It was very sweet. At one of those dinners, Ted proposed. We try to make things special, but we don’t necessarily do a lot of pomp and circumstance. So, our wedding wasn’t going to be a big production. We wanted to celebrate in a way that felt super chill and true to who we are.”
“I know this may sound like some people’s nightmare, but we picked a date one month away and told everyone. Then we had to find a place. Duluth is gorgeous in the summer, and we wanted to do it outside. We found a community center at the beach with a slot open in the afternoon. I think it was $125 to rent. Day of, we showed up, took a swim in the lake, and then got ready in the community center. I wanted flowers in my hair, and my friend brought baby’s breath. I got the dress off the rack from Nordstrom and did my own makeup.”
“In summer 2021, with Covid travel restrictions, my family and friends from Tanzania couldn’t come. So they Skyped in.”
“We walked down to the beach together, and the tall grass formed an aisle.”
“Before the wedding, we came up with the idea to do the ceremony with our feet in the water. It felt right given our love of Lake Superior. My best friend officiated.”
“We had a gathering the night before for out-of-towners, and I joked that I was going to start my vows with ‘Someday, we’re all going to die…’ Everybody thought that was a terrible idea. In this photo, I’m laughing because I went with that opener. For me, it was about death being a reminder to maximize life. In my vows, I said I wouldn’t want to spend my life with anyone else.”
“It’s a public beach, and when we kissed, strangers nearby cheered and clapped along with our friends and family. That was lovely.”
“The community center is a government building, so it’s not the cutest, but having the party outside helped. I went to Goodwill and found lace panels, which made it feel more private and intimate since the field is pretty big and along a street. A friend who is an interior designer helped with set up. Someone else brought their lawn games.”
“I could totally feel the wedding industrial complex. We briefly worked with a wedding coordinator who was used to doing more extravagant weddings. Whenever we suggested something, they’d take it up five notches. I just kept thinking, I don’t care about this stuff, and I’m not going to go into debt for it. We stopped working with them and put our money toward the particular things we did care about. Like, we cared about food, but we didn’t care if the meal was fancy. We hired a food truck, and it was great. Total, I think we spent around $2,000.”
“Our friend Peter Witrak, a musician, did such a great job as our DJ. He also strummed a guitar on the beach before the ceremony.”
“It felt like a backyard hang with friends when a good song comes on and people just get up to dance. We had the perfect wedding for us.”
Thanks so much, Daisy!
P.S. More wedding posts, including four New York city hall weddings, and a stoop wedding in Brooklyn.
(Photos by Liz Pawlik.)
Comments
81 commentsI’m currently planning a wedding, and keep referring to this post as a sort of north star. I also want something that feels special but relaxed, and whenever I feel the pressure of the wedding industrial complex start to creep up again, I return here – Daisy and Ted really had the right idea, and the joy that emanates from these photos is the thing I want most for my wedding (and marriage!) to emulate. So simple, beautiful, and full of love!
Absolute dream of a wedding! Loved reading about it and it made me feel even better about my own wedding coming up which is gonna be smaller, even more intimate but just the way we would like it to be! :) Thanks so much for the inspiration, Daisy, you were such a beautiful bride! :)
Congrats to this bewitching couple. I wish them many long years of happiness together. Way back when I got married, I was so young, and didn’t know anything. My mother was very forceful about proper this and proper that. I did listen to much of it, but I’m very glad I didn’t to just as much. We really had a wedding that reflected our values – simple, kind, down to earth. And I don’t regret that at all. If I couldn’t have had the wedding I did, I would definitely elope. I always taught my daughters, who grew up in the say yes to the dress era, that a wedding is just one day. And that day should be about your marriage and future happiness, nothing else. Do exactly what you want. We are celebrating 30 years of mostly happily ever after this summer. We’ll probably grab drive in burgers and shakes on our way to camping for the weekend. And we’re thinking of getting ring tattoos (if I can ever choose a design) since neither of us wear our rings.
Such a beautiful, loving, happy wedding!!!! It makes me smile.. I would wish this beautiful couple a lifetime of happiness but I think they have that covered!!!!!!!!!
I have a big family but how I wish I can do this on my wedding! The whole time I was reading, I just felt at peace. It’s so beautiful. A lot of the things Daisy said resonated with me and I hope I can use those to encourage me to truly go for a wedding that represents me and my fiance.
My husband and I eloped in Sedona and would not change a thing. It was just us, the driver, the photographer, an the officiant. We hiked in the morning then he dropped me off for hair and then we went and got married. It was so low stress and meaningful. We wrote our own vows and some of the parts were pretty hilarious. I wouldn’t change a thing!
Daisy, I love your weeding! Could you share your 17 things that you were looking for … in a partner? Thanks and congrats ♥️
This is the most beautiful wedding I think I’ve ever seen. And what a gorgeous couple. Wishing them so many happy years together from this internet stranger!!!
What a wonderful wedding celebration. It feels so full of love and happiness. It’s great to get the sense of Daisy’s and Ted’s personalities and to see their joy.
We had a 300 person wedding in a big field and it felt very much like us too with our friends band playing and a big bbq buffet and bonfire. I’ve been to so many of the exact same wedding so any time anyone does something uniquely them it’s a breath of fresh air.
Here’s a wedding hack from a friend who shopped off the rack sort of: look for a bridesmaids dress in a blush/beige/off white/white. My friend did that with Anthropologie: the bridesmaids dresses of the same color and detail are half to 1/3 the price of their bridal dresses
Adding my voice to the love for intimate weddings. Of course if it’s always been your dream to have a big wedding and you have a few hundred friends and family go for it. But this has never been for everyone but the examples and inspirational content rarely shows people how to do something else. That out of the way I’m going to encourage investment in a photographer. I too had a small wedding at home. It was during Covid so even our out of state family couldn’t come. There were three guests and us. My sister gifted a photographer and just like the event featured here she captured the joy, lovely little moments and elevated the everyday with her photos.
This wedding sounds absolutely magical and refreshingly authentic! Daisy’s approach to finding “the one” and their lakeside celebration is truly inspiring.
This made me smile and tear up! This is the most beautiful and authentic celebration of real love!
Honestly one of my favorite weddings I’ve ever read about!! Gorgeous natural setting and the light!!!
Absolutely lovely! To me this is actually what a wedding is meant to be. This is very much like my handfasting in 2020- in our backyard, friends ran the bar, a local restaurant catered it, my sister and friends and I got bulk buckets of flowers from a local flower farmer and stayed up the night before making table arrangements. I did my own hair and make up and wore a vintage dress I got for $200 at a local consignment store. our best friend facilitated a beautiful ceremony that included everyone there. Family zoomed in b/c it was height of covid still. Friends and family sprinkled little surprises throughout. The biggest expense besides food was the photographer which I am so glad we hired out to a professional. I was six weeks pregnant with our daughter at the time, but we weren’t announcing yet. Now my daughter loves to see the picture of us in our field all dressed up.
What a lovely wedding!!! I also talked about death in my vows. Promising my husband that I would be with him when he dies. But then livened it up with “And I promise that I’ll close the medicine cabinet. Like really close it, so that it clicks.”
This is so lovely and is the exact spot where we beach on a weekly basis in the summer! Loving the Duluth love on Cup of Jo this week! Do we need a Cup of Jo meet-up on Lake Superior?? I’ll host! ♥️
Yes please. June?
Small weddings are a breath of fresh air :) ours was a little bigger due to immediate family & kids (40 adults, 20 kids) & it was a blast. We topped out at $8,500 including photography & I wouldn’t change a thing. My (now) husband says all wedding decor looks alike, so we quickly agreed on no decor. We did all of our flowers from Trader Joe’s & brought our own dessert to our local boathouse for our reception. Rented kayaks & paddleboats & had everyone bring a change of clothes. Then, we had a “party at the park” that was essentially a lowkey bday party for extended family & friends. It wasn’t super necessary for us, but it was sweet to have a reason to celebrate after we were already married!
This is absolutely beautiful. Daisy is beautiful, joyful, radiant. The whole thing is perfect. I love the white decorations, the hanging fabric dividers, etc. This is so real. I like her opening line. Why not ?? Love to you both. W.O.W.
This was the best and my favorite wedding feature. Everything looks gorgeous and thoughtful and genuine. Love this couple. Congrats!
This is beautiful. We had a wedding we loved, outdoors in a big historic property that we rented for the weekend so everyone in the family could stay together and the party didn’t need to have an end time! Our guests stayed in the nearby town and we spent the whole weekend celebrating – pool swims, walks by the water, a lovely rehearsal dinner in the big house, and then the formal ceremony and celebration outside at night. My grandmother was our officiant (we legally married ourselves, in DC where we live, after the weekend) – and my favorite part is that before the wedding, we had a dinner with her wherein we all drank lots of wine and she shared all the secrets to her very happy 60-year marriage to my grandfather, and we took copious notes, and those love stories became the basis of our ceremony script, which we crafted to include all relevant traditions and everyone we wanted to play a role. It was to this day my favorite wedding ever. And as another commenter said, although we couldn’t have known this at the time, we had a number of deaths in the family afterwards and it was the last time everyone was all together. For anyone planning now, I highly recommend grandma officiants!!
This post is amazing – I have run by that community center dozens of times and considered what my alternate-universe wedding might look like if I held it there (or the boathouse farther down the point). It’s cool to see that idea come to life in someone else’s vision!
Currently in the throes of wedding planning (June 14 can’t get here soon enough) with a wedding way bigger than either of us intended. The jealousy I have for this perfect day!
That’s my birthday as I always say,”June 14th, the best day of the year!!” May it be yours too 💕💕💕
Have a wonderful wedding! June 14 is also my birthday …. I hope it is the best day of your year indeed, with many wonderful repeats.
this feels like a great omen! It’s my bestie’s bday, too! <3
What a beautiful couple and grounded, real wedding story. I love that they shrugged off the wedding-industrial-complex ‘pressure’ and kept it simple. I also got married in an off-the rack Nordstrom dress at a public park :) – we were a tiny group at 8:30 in the morning in a grove of redwoods in Muir Woods. A friend officiated us and a friend took photos and we went out for a fancy lunch then celebrated the next day with a potluck party in our backyard. I am 100% here for simple, inexpensive, events and also had 0 desire to be standing in front of a large group of people while saying deeply personal things / smooching – HA! I know I’m in the minority though, so as we say – “good for them, not for me”. Love these gorgeous, intimate, relatable stories CoJ team. x
Who else wants to move to Duluth?
I already think about it sometimes! Maybe …
i love this soi much!! congratulations!!
Such a beautiful, meaningful way to celebrate marriage. I’m so happy reading this story. Congratulations to the stunning bride and handsome groom. I’m from MN & lived in Duluth during my college years, Lake Superior means so much to a lot of Minnesotans. I love how simple the wedding was, how sweet the concept of walking down the aisle with your partner. The reception at a community center. It fills my heart. Again, Congratulations and thank you for sharing.
Just love this! More low key weddings please!:)
I agree! I love seeing these small, intimate weddings that radiate such warmth and love.
Yes, I second this. I look forward to marrying my beautiful boyfriend in a very low-key way and seeing these ideas is great!
We got married on a barrier island beach in FL in 2012. It was the same beach where we’d vacationed each year as a couple, for over 10 years. We figured: we’re going to be here anyway…. There were twelve people total, immediate family only. We hung out on the beach that day, and I went upstairs to get ready at 3:00 for a 6:00 sunset ceremony. Did my own hair and makeup and wore a blush-colored dress that I got for an astonishing bargain at Neiman Marcus. The evening cooperated magnificently, with a rosy-lavender-golden sunset and clouds over the water that Constable would have swooned over. Afterward, we went to a local waterfront bistro for a decadent wedding supper and sat outside in the soft humid air to eat French food and drink champagne. I arranged everything with, I believe, fewer than ten phone calls. We did spend about $10k, not including our rings, but we covered everyone’s accommodations for the week and all expenses during our wedding weekend itself. My dad and sister-in-law have since passed away, and in retrospect, it was the last time that everyone was all together. 13 years later, I’d do it all again, exactly the same way.
This sounds like such a lovely day and a lovely memory to have.
The feet in the water — my god, how simple and how stunning. I love that. As well as the baby’s breath hair, lace panels and food truck. I can imagine the clapping of cheers of your guests but also strangers on the beach — I’m sure it’s become a sweet memory for them too. (I also had strangers cheering at my wedding: our venue was overlooked by medieval walls which the public can walk around, and when they see a bride coming into the garden, they can watch the ceremony from a distance! I didn’t mind <3) Everything about this wedding seems warm and authentic and completely focused on the right things. Plus a Great Lake! Just gorgeous. Congratulations, Daisy and Ted!
This is absolutely perfect!
I had my second time around wedding in the backyard, on the porch my husband built for me to work out on during the pandemic, with just our immediate family. We had a catered dinner outside and hung a disco ball. All three generations danced. It was perfect. I recently lost my job in global health (thanks Elon/Trump) and am thinking about a business in micro-weddings and events. A small form of resistance, let’s be joyful.
Excellent idea Ann. Personally, I want to have a micro wedding and could use a little guidance…. so I hope you go for it. :-D
How beautiful! Congratulations to you both!
Grew up on Lake Superior – it has a magnetism and power that people don’t get. So magical. These two perfectly encapsulate the spirit of hippie Duluth. The joy beams through. LOVE to you both. Would love to see that whole list.
The first time I saw Lake Superior – I cried. It is my favorite place. It has a magical draw that I can’t explain.
Everyone looks beautiful and comfortable and happy here!!! My friend Bea invited us all over for meatballs that her nonna made and said please respect my nonna and show up on-time so everyone did and surprise! It was Bea’s wedding and we all sat on the stairs and cheered and ate meatballs
haha this is cute
25 years ago I had a registry office wedding in London that could not have been more special and sweet. There were 8 of us in total – immediate family only. We had a professional photographer friend-of-a-friend drink champagne with us and take amazing, relaxed photos. We splurged on a very fancy lunch – because when there are only 8 people to feed, you can make sure your mother-in-law gets lobster if she wants lobster. She also made our wedding cake – and that fancy London members club treated her cake with all the care and respect it deserved. 10/10 recommend doing exactly what feels right on your day.
Sustainable and simple is the chic-est! For my wedding, I picked blooming weeds off the side of the road. ( what a humble brag hahaha6
I cannot overstate how much I f*&king LOVE this wedding. So beautiful, authentic, relaxed, free. A A breath of fresh air X
I love this! We had our wedding at a farm museum in Minnesota. As people arrived they kept saying I haven’t been here since my elementary school trip. So funny for me who didn’t grow up there. We wanted a party where we got married and that’s what we had. We had a pig roast and people danced in a barn to songs on an MP3 player (so long ago that was novel!). Somewhere along the process I learned a super valuable piece of advice that is the advice I give to people getting married – I know, don’t roll your eyes yet! If you really care about something about the wedding, don’t tell people. They’ll have an opinion before and enjoy it when it happens so just do what you want! It’s your (meaning the collective couple’s) wedding! My mother-in-law was very worried about the lack of a Catholic church wedding. At the wedding, she thought the minister did a lovely job. She didn’t know he was only official hours before the wedding when the state recognized his Universal Life Church certificate!
This is exactly how we did our wedding, too, back in 2015! The reception at least; we actually just got married at city hall. But for the party a few days later, we rented a community center (a beautiful historic mansion off of a park where we lived) with thrifted and handmade decor (vintage camping theme with lace, plaid, enamelware, and dried flowers) and lawn games, and we hired a food truck to churn out pizzas all night. Funnily enough, my dress was also off the rack from Nordstrom, and I made a little headband with faux baby’s breath. Daisy, we’re wedding twins!
Oh my goodness, this is lovely and real and exactly the kind of wedding I want to see more of… congratulations you two!
I also had a low key wedding and I am still glad with our choice with one exeption. We didn’t have a professional photograph. At that time I thought I don’t need that but overtime I regrett it. We have some nice pics made by family and friends but totally forget about e.g. group photos. I wish we had someone experienced who thougt about stuff like that.
Daisy and Ted’s lakeside wedding is truly charming. Their low – key, personal approach, from the DIY decor to the meaningful vows, makes it a beautiful celebration of love.
Wow. How refreshing! I come from a culture where big (expensive!) weddings are the norm and don’t get me wrong, there’s something so lovely about belonging to a large community, but very often, the pomp and circumstance overshadows that special feeling and intimacy of two people joining in union.
We had a traditional wedding with all the bells and whistles. It was the best day and I felt so loved when we got out of the church and everyone we knew (and quite frankly also quite a few people only our parents knew) were out there waiting for us. I loved the day (prince and princess for a day) but I do think that we would have done it differently if we had been older at the time. At that point in our twenties (23 and 25), we were still very influenced by our parents and their need to prove to their environment that they were successful in life and family and that they could afford to (help) give their kids a classic wedding. On the upside, our parents bonded over the whole experience (both sets having the same need) and we learned valuable lessons for life as a couple (such as: “in case of disagreements, each person leads the discussion with their own parents, even if your partner is the one who is actually frustrated about a decision/action).
Easy peasy!! I love everything about this wedding! Daisy and Ted are the cutest!! Thanks for sharing ❤️
The fuss about death in the vows makes me realize how little we ‘listen’ to the traditional ones, after all, “till death do we part”.
Me and my husband had a small ceremony so many years ago and I could relate to so much of what she said! I also did my own makeup, wore a dress I bought “off the rack”. It was just right for us and I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. Thanks for sharing this lovely ceremony. I could be great friends with the bride. :)
I just love this. It sounded like a lovely time with no fuss or muss. I loved the idea of a food truck. Thought the lace panels were a brilliant idea. Depending on where you live, finding an inexpensive, affordable venue could be the main sticking point. (I live in the largest East Coast city and unless someone was happy using a church basement, there were no other inexpensive venues and I don’t know, not a place I’d want. This community center had the beach. Not sure they would have been happy inside. Looks like they all had fun and yes, there are not that many guests, which also helps.
Also, loving the Duluth content this week!
I love this so much. What a lovely wedding and beautiful couple!
Here for Minnesota week! I love my state SO much. I moved away 15 yrs ago and now I’m trying to figure out how to get back. :/ It’s so nice to read comments from people like me who hold the niche opinion that the Great Lakes > regular old oceans, haha.
I am imagining how cold Lake Superior must have been and how this is a lovely metaphor for how marriage can be a lot of beauty with a bit of difficulty at times.
Getting married with your feet in a Great Lake (looks and) sounds dreamy. Love this wedding!
Such a dreamy wedding! I had a big wedding with a large crowd and loved it but if I could do it all over again (with the same person :)) I would have a much smaller affair!
This truly was a breath of fresh air on a week when I needed one!
This is lovely. What a couple! Two people who are very clear on what actually matters. Their joy radiates from every photo. May they have a long and loving marriage.
Great story and the photos! All are beautiful but particularly love that last image.
Just beautiful! Simple and so lovely. Here’s to a wonderful forever Daisy and Ted. Much much love. xx
What a ray of sunshine this is. Thanks for the big smile and congratulations ❤️
YYYYAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSS to this quote “We briefly worked with a wedding coordinator who was used to doing more extravagant weddings. Whenever we suggested something, they’d take it up five notches. I just kept thinking, I don’t care about this stuff, and I’m not going to go into debt for it. “
Much love for Great Lakes beach weddings! I got married on the beach of Lake Michigan and now I wish we had put our feet in the water! We stood on a little sandy rise above the waterline on a sunny September morning. We served mimosas and brunch after.
Loooooooooooove this!!!
My husband and I did something similar in 2021! We got married in our backyard and made it very informal. We bought a bunch of decor at thrift stores, made crockpot meatballs from IKEA and pulled pork from Costco. It was perfect. And the best part of it was of course that it was a truly celebration about US and for us. (We were each married for many years prior, and felt our younger selves first weddings were more about the party and the “event” rather than being deeply meaningful.) my hubs and I dated briefly (4 mos?) in high school and never really talked again. (I remember being mad because I couldn’t truly be mad at him, he was so nice and honest about our breakup! Ahh, to be 16, lol.) 35 years later, he reached out via Linked In during the pandemic lockdown and we were married one year later. It’s taken so long, and mistakes along the way, but I’m so happy he found me. Again. :).
Beautiful couple! I love the Goodwill lace curtains so much.
I love this! Thank you for sharing such a low key wedding! Inspiring!
So much Duluth/Lake Superior love on COJ this week!! Makes my local heart swell. I thought for sure I’d recognize someone in those wedding photos, Duluth is such a small town! What a beautiful wedding that encapsulated the Duluth vibe so well. <3
Loved, loved, loved this! My husband and I got married in a similar way with a similar time frame after being together for almost 20 years and with our two kids. While it was sad that not everyone could come, it was magical to get married in a friend’s backyard with a friend officiating and our two favorite little faces smiling on.
Love this! Congratulations to the bride and groom! One of the best weddings I ever attended was at the bride’s parents house (small) and then they served cake and punch. Just lovely and I still remember it more than 35+ years later. I have been to many wedding since and while they were very nice, they weren’t as memorable.