A Giggly Evening With Kate Baer
Last night, I spent an hour laughing with poet Kate Baer on stage…
Kate’s fourth book — How About Now — came out today, and tackles friendship, marriage, parenting, and aging, with a nice dollop of existential dread. I know it’s a bold statement, but it might be my favorite of her books so far.
“I’m an open book,” Kate told me (evidenced by the fact that she has a poem called ‘At Pelvic Floor Therapy’). “Whenever you tell the truth, you always hear, ‘Me, too.’”
The audience was electric — and asked such good questions, too.
Williamsburg Pizza even sent a little snack before the talk. How cute is that?
If you’d like to watch the event, here’s the video, below. I cut to our actual discussion, skipping the part where I tried to warm up the audience by asking them to do the wave lol. It’s slightly hard to hear at the beginning, but gets better about 30 seconds later, once we figured out how to correctly hold our microphones.
If you’d like to skip around, here are some timestamps:
12:16 — talking about turning 40
13:52 — Kate reads the poem ‘Frog Queen’
14:33 — we talk about funny preteens and teens
17:22 — Kate reads the poem ‘One Day’
18:26 — our thoughts on Lily Allen’s new album
20:09 — how Kate is an open book
21:08 — Kate’s favorite line in the book
22:22 — lighting round with questions about her pets’ names and her sex playlist
27:45 — Kate on planning trivia nights and themed parties
Where should we come next? We have Boston and Minneapolis on our list.
P.S. Nine ways that Kate Baer is making her 40s her best decade yet, and Kate’s poems about having babies and toddlers.
Comments
141 commentsLondon!!
Woo! When will you be in Minneapolis?!
Boston!!!!
Yayyyyyyyyy!!!!
Come to Ann Arbor!! Literati is an incredible bookstore and lots of nostalgic UM locations that I’m sure would love to host you!
Heidelberg, Germany please!
Kate, I was laying down today, in a tattoo shop getting some new work done- and two of the women working had been to your talk at Pocket Books in Lancaster, PA! I was eavesdropping hard. 😊 I am sorry I missed you traveling directly to my favorite bookstore.
DC pls pls pls!! Was so hoping that it would be a stop on the tour – will continue to advocate. Could not be more timely!
Seconded!
Thirded!!
Scottsdale/Phoenix! No better place to be in the winter. ;)
Chicago, please!!
I’d swing down to Boston from Vermont!!
Can we please have a full Kate Baer wardrobe post? I follow her on IG and between the above and IG I want all of her clothes!
Yes, come to Minneapolis!
My town?! Minneapolis?! Is on the list!!!? Dahhh! :O!!
Austin!!! I know it’s in Texas, but the tacos, margs, and the lovely Grace Farris make it ok. Also, I would hop on a plane to see you in Denver :) And bravo, Kate!!! xoxo
Second this!!!
I had a hard day yesterday, and when I told my fella I wanted to go by our local bookstore to get the new poems, he said, “I’d love to go with you!” Turns out, he told me that so I would go to his place first – and see he had already bought it for me. Swoon.
Swoon indeed! So sweet!
So excited to see Kate in LA next week! Maybe I’ll wear a name tag like Napa Melanie. Should we all start wearing name tags?
YES! The name tags can be like a code known to COJ readers!!
Nashville and Parnassus books (Anne Patchett!) would love to have you. As would many of us.
Yes!! Come to Nashville 🙌🏽
Raising a hand for Nashville!!!
King’s English Bookstore in Salt Lake City, UT!
Yes! My friend Calvin is one of the owners and has created the coziest little labyrinth of a bookstore.
Random thing to comment about but Joanna’s voice is different than I’d imagined. I’ve followed Cup of Jo for years but clearly never heard her speak. It was a great listen, thanks:)
Come to Vancouver, Canada!
And Toronto!!!
And Calgary!
Just wondering… the church is gorgeous but could the audio/visibility situation be improved by holding these events in a different venue?
Heck yes! Come to Minneapolis. It is lovely here!
Wait Joanna are you joining Kate’s St. Paul stop on 11/17? Got hopeful when I saw your Minneapolis comment, but maybe that’s a separate event?
I’m also confused by this!
There is an amazing bookshop called Wild Geese in Franklin, IN (a suburb of Indianapolis) that can sell out a crowd for almost every author that comes through! Bonus: one of their author event spaces is a beautiful historic movie theatre called The Artcraft. Indianapolis in general has an excellent indie book scene and literary community, we would love a visit!
I would love to visit!
I was fortunate enough to have been there for this and it was honestly the highlight of my YEAR! Utter perfection. I will forever think of this night when I listen to “Pussy Palace” or any Cardi B. LOL
+1
Atlanta, please!
Denver Denver Denver!!! Please and thank you :)
This may be a shot in the dark! But would you ever consider Madison, WI?! The city isn’t as big as it’s larger counterparts, but we have an amazing, beloved independently owned bookstore that has been in business since 1975. It has a long ranging history of being a feminist and political space. Madison is beautiful in the summer and fall and has a lot to offer for a mid-sized city! We’d be thrilled to have you visit!!
oh! I don’t live in Madison anymore but did for several years and I support this message!!!! I love and miss A Room of One’s Own!
Joanna — what jeans are you wearing here?? So cute!!
I second this :)
Come to Columbus, Ohio!
Second this!
Yes!!!
Ooooo! A Columbus Cup of Jo meet up!!
My best friend and I have a ritual every time Kate releases a new book: I order us both a copy, and she orders us dinner. We get together and read the poems aloud to each other and clutch our hearts. We recently got matching tattoos with a line from “The Women Who Walk Us Home.” We are Kate stans for life. My inscription for Kate’s latest book in my friend’s copy is this: “To the one who knows all my stories (we do, we do), and the one who is always there for me (even then).” The OGs will get the references <3
I’m crying. I love you both so much. Thank you for making my week (my life?). We do, we do.
Kate, I’ve followed you since your blog and I am so happy for your successes! Four books! NYT bestseller! Congrats and all the best to you. :)
Where did Kate get those awesome tights? Would love to know
I walked by an urban outfitters a few hours before the event, popped in to look for regular tights, and found those instead!
Sidebar question: Joanna where are your shoes from?! I have been searching high and low for a pair of pumps that are low enough to be comfortable walking in for long distances/stretches of time. Could you do a post or share your recs if you have any you like?
Marion Parke! https://marionparke.com/collections/block-heels
Joanna’s shoes are fabulous and her smile is so BIG. Love it
Congratulations on Mamdani’s win, New Yorkers! Cheering so loudly from Chicago!!
Yes ! And congratulations to our whole country on Mamdani’s win ! It’s a start ! The times they are a changin’ hopefully.
Another Chicagoan feeling so excited for you NYC!!
Yes! I’m so thrilled. Also here to say that I need a Cup of Jo interview with Rama Duwaji like, yesterday :) Her art is so moving, her dress for voting day was so chic, etc.
I heard cheers all around our neighborhood last night!! SO thrilled.
I was just in Brooklyn on Sunday to cheer on my friend running the marathon and after I spotted her I ran my own mini marathon to Books Are Magic for a quick visit before getting over to pick her up at the finish line. Was so sad that I had to return home to Boston before seeing Kate but am here to comment YES PLEASE to Boston! I’m already imagining the gaggle of my dear women friends who would join me!!
Ahem…HOW IS THIS A KATE BAER POST WITHOUT A KATE BAER POEM?! Truly, the closest CoJ has ever come to clickbait.
Kate reads a bunch of her poems in the video.
Denver please!!!
I second Denver!
2nd the vote for Denver!
yes please!
Seems like we need a Denver COJ hang out either way.
Pittsburgh would love to have you!
Yes!!!
Please! White Whale books would be the perfect host!
Plz come to MPLS! Xo a desperate Chicago transplant
This is my first comment after reading for many years … Yesss please!! Come to Minnesota!!
Yes, MN please!
Another enthusiastic vote for coming to MN! ❤️
She’s coming to St. Paul on 11/17!!
Southeast- ATLANTA!!!!!!!!!!!! Or for a college town vibe: Athens, Ga
Denver!!! I’ll make an entire mountain week itinerary for you while you’re here. You won’t regret it!
Another vote for Denver, pretty please!!
Baltimore – we have a great literary/arts community that would love to show up for Kate!
Yes, Baltimore, please!!!!!!
Yes, Baltimore please. We will show out and you can visit the Visionary Art Museum.
Baltimore! It is a great city!
Richmond, VA!
Oh PLEASE come to Hartford. Though I’d settle for New Haven…
Philly!!
This was a good distraction because I’m so excited yet so apprehensive as the polls close tonight in NYC! I hope New Yorkers came out and did their thing today!
We did! We did our thing!!! Woohooooo!!!!!!!!
Yes you did ! :) Thank you..
Minneapolis!! Love it!
DENVER!
Michigan please :)
Durham, NC please!!
YES to Durham!
I’m going to Kate’s reading next week in Napa. I just moved here and need to make friends. I decided that the kind of people there are the kind of people I want to know. So if anyone sees a person sitting awkwardly by herself, and you’re feeling friendly, please say hi!
Love this!!!! Wear a name tag, Melanie!
You are on the right track!
Melanie! I’m going to be the person interviewing Kate Baer on stage! Say hi at any point – I’d love to get coffee at Bookmine sometime and introduce you to Napa.
I can’t wait to meet you.
Definitely going to find a name tag to wear to this now : ) Kate, excited to meet you as well! Teresa, so kind of you to offer that! I would love to grab coffee at Bookmine soon. I’ll find you after the interview to chat more!!
I’m moving to Toronto in a few weeks and attending reading there. Hoping to also find like-minded friends!
I’ve been thinking about buying tickets. What section/row are you in? I’ll try to find something close! I moved to Napa 6 years ago and love it.
Catherine, I’m from Toronto and going to Kate’s reading too! Let’s meet and I’ll give introduce you to the best of Toronto (hint: it’s as amazing as everyone always says).
Kristina – I’m in Orchestra Row G Seat 108! Would love to meet you!! Catherine – best of luck in Toronto. I lived in Montreal for 7 years, and Canada has a very special place in my heart <3
Lindsay – oh my goodness, that would be amazing! How can we be sure to connect? Thank you, Melanie! <3
Catherine – hide & seak amongst the toques? Look for a bright pink wool coat :) We really need a Cup of Jo DM system!
Philly!!!
I’m screeching over how good this is! I have the absolute honor of getting to interview Kate on stage in Napa next Tuesday (aaaaah) and now I’m a mix of excited, smitten with both of you, inspired, and about to throw up from nerves. If y’all are in the Bay Area/North Bay of California, please come out and join us at the Uptown Theater in Napa on 11/11.
And Melanie two comments up is looking to make friends with people in Napa! Someone to ease your nerves?
I will be there. Cannot wait!!!
Please come to Denver!
This looks so fun but audio is not good. Any way to filter this on your side for better sound? Oh, and Santa Cruz for your road show, PLEASE and THANK YOU!
Books Are Magic did the recording but maybe we’ll do our own next time!
I’m so bummed–I feel like I’m 100 years old because I can barely make it out. Definitely do your podcasting pro record next time please! KB/JG convos are one of my favorite mood boosters! Trying to squint my ears through it.
Is there a transcript? I can’t listen to this
DC….PLEASE we need something good and positive to look forward to amidst all the…absolute chaos and bs and darkness.
Yes! Joining in the DC chorus from below too – it has been somewhere between depressing and downright scary living in DC. Most days it feels like we are frogs in a simmering pot with front row seats to all that Trump and his supports are destroying. Anything good or positive is very appreciated here <3
Yes, please DC! I’m prepping my name tag
Is that the Unitarian Church in Brooklyn Heights? I got married there 20 years ago (reception at Frankie’s).
Yes!! What a dream!!
Oh my gosh!! I came here to ask about the location because I knew it looked familiar—I attend that UU 20 years ago when I was a fun 20 something in Brooklyn. What a place of connection and community it was for me then. Also! Amber I loved Frankie’s so much my middle son’s nickname is Frankie (his full name is a family name with Franklin as his middle name and we all call him Frankie). Can’t wait to listen and even more can’t wait to read Kate’s latest. xoxo
Birmingham!!!
Upvote!
Another vote for Bham! ❤️
DC/MD/VA! We could use some cheer in these parts!
THIS SO HARD! :)
DC, baby! This city needs some cheering up right now!
Denver!
I remember watching Lily Allan and her then husbands’ AD Open Door on YouTube and thinking, “They hate each other!” I am glad they’ve been set free.
Umm, Dallas?? We don’t get enough love from the erudite set – we need you to come here!! Warm weather, friendly people, amazing food (barbecue! The best tacos! Queso!).
Boston, prettiest please!!
PHOENIX! Come in the spring when it’s cold everywhere else. ☀️
Seconding this, come warm your bones in our amazing winter weather!
Yes! My vote is for Changing Hands.
Kansas City area…check out Rainy Day Books!!!
Exactly.
Another Sarah co-signing for KC!
Yes! Agree! Going to Rainy Day today to get my copy!!
Philly! Just a quick train ride away!