February 27, 2026
How Long Can I Call My Baby a Baby?
500 months or so?
Michelle Rial is the author and illustrator of the forthcoming picture book Charts for Babies. Her work has appeared in The New Yorker, Oprah Daily, WIRED, and more. She is the mom to one baby (ahem — toddler).
P.S. Questions I’ve asked after having a baby, and March ladies.
Tags: comics
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91 commentsMy partner is the youngest of 7 and was born a few months after his father passed away. They lived in a small town and his father was one of only 2 doctors so everyone knew them. Just last month his mother passed away and all these old friends and neighbors from that town came to the funeral. Each of them commented on how grown up “the baby” was and asked him what he’s doing now and told us a story of holding him. He’s 49 and bald but all night long he was once again “the baby” and I was both dying laughing and also tearing up of how much that whole town loved him.
My son called my daughter “Baby” instead of her actual name. It killed me when he stopped around her second birthday!
My daughter used to refer to herself as baby! It was the sweetest thing.
My son, who’s 30, asked me to stop calling him “kiddo” yesterday. I said I’d stop, but I’m taking it really hard. 😞
My kids are 21 and 24 and still both “kiddo” sometimes. So far, so good. (Always my kiddos….)
My nine-year-old daughter has recently started calling her three-year-old sister a “middle-aged baby.” As an actual middle-aged mom, it made me laugh!
Ok, I know this is different from what we’re talking about, but it is NOT hot when my MIL calls my husband her “baby.” Don’t infantilize your sons!
Or daughters
My 15-year-old will always be my baby, but I don’t call him that or refer to him that way. My dog, however, regularly gets referred to as “my dog-baby.”
This reminds me of a book from my childhood, “Love You Forever”. It’s sweet, maybe a bit creepy, but holds a dear place in my heart! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love_You_Forever I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, As long as I’m living, My baby you’ll be
My brother is 51 this year, and this weekend when his beautiful dog got sick (they’re removing his spleen) my bother called my mum and just cried into the phone. Before he called though he texted her and said “I can’t talk”. When his world falls apart, he just wants her care, and she just weeps inside because he will ALWAYS be her (second) baby!.
I’ve been bursting into random tears all weekend because my little boy is turning one in 35 days. The melancholy! Only rivaled by when he went to daycare. This post hit me in the feels. Forever my baby <3
mine are almost 30 and 27. They will always be my babies. I am their mother! Having said that – we work and achieve a wonderful adult relationship. couldn’t be more blessed.
My husband and I still refer to our 5 year old as ‘the baby’ but only to each other! When friends have had kids I’ve described them to my son as ‘Baby so-and-so’ for their first few years to remind him they’re little and to be gentle while playing!
My children will always be my babies. I sometimes call them the girl child and the boy child, and my mother ALWAYS says that they aren’t children. I reply that they are and always be my children, so…Of course, she also called for my birthday yesterday, called me old, complained about things that are causing her pain, and said if she’d had a gun she would have shot herself because the pain had been so bad that morning. A child (yeah, I’m still her child even though I’m OLD) never needs to hear that from their parent. What the heck am I supposed to do with that?? Sorry, it’s obviously still bugging me.
<3
I’m so sorry, Anon. One time, while grieving the loss of a partner, my mother told me that if it wasn’t for my sisters and I, she wouldn’t still be here. It was really difficult to hear and a burden I still bear. Sending you love <3
You don’t need to do anything with it – you are fully allowed to ignore it, not give in to her cry for attention, and just let her be. If you need to implement boundaries there, you can also do that. Signed, someone who has a difficult mother also.
I’m so sorry, Anon. I’ve had similar experiences with my mother over the years, and it’s so difficult to process. Now that I have my daughter, I feel it even more acutely. Why would a mother want their child to hurt for them? I can’t make any sense of it. Hang in there, anon. And, as Sarah says, set any boundaries you need. Sending love.
I found an extension cheat code for calling my ten year old this- I call him Long Baby, and only in private. Like in the morning, I’ll say “good morning LONG Baby!” And I’ll find his foot from the top of the covers, lift it by the toe and go “So long! The longest baby! What happened??!!” He thinks this is hilarious, and I’ll keep doing it until the eyeroll tells me to stop
Lol I might try this
Me: “I’ll always be your mommy.” My daughter: “I’ll always be your baby.” It’s something we’ve always said to each other and always will.
All of these reminders of the circle of life. We can be both babies and mothers of babies. My mom passed away 5 years ago and yet I’m still her baby. When I gave birth to my own babies, she came to be there with me when I brought them home. Not to change diapers (she had done enough of that with 5 kids). But to take care of me. To bring me trail mix as I struggled to breast feed while also comedically telling me I’d need to “cover up” once my dad arrived. Oh my how I miss that hilarious juxtaposition of her being so nurturing of me while also being so oldschool thinking of my dad. Mothers are the ultimate jugglers!
My mom passed away last spring & I am the youngest. I was always her baby, but she probably told all of us that. She had a gift that made every kid, grandkid, & friend feel like they were her favorite. When we brought our first baby home from the hospital, she was right beside me as I slept on his bedroom floor for a total of 30 min all night. She was the best. When my eldest sibling, 52 year old brother, was saying goodbye to her, my dad said when she looked at my brother, the absolute love & adoration on her face was the same look she gave my brother on the day he was born. Heartbreakingly beautiful.
I have an 11 year old baby. But I only call her so in private and tell her regularly how big and accomplished she is. At that age especially they need space to be both.
doo doo doo dummm doo doo doo do do do dummmm >>Always Be My Baby<< My babies are 3.5 and I can't ever imagine them not being my babies.
Michelle!! So sweet. I just wrote a little poem of the same theme for my son’s (my, lol) scrap book, “When are you not a baby anymore?”
∞
The other day at school, I was getting my son early for an appointment and my daughter couldn’t join. She saw me and rightfully got upset when I told her I wasn’t taking her home and so I said, “It’s ok, Baby, I’ll be back to pick you up a little later. I love you.” A little boy in her class looked at me very sternly and said, “She is not a baby! She’s a big girl!!” They’re in preschool, haha. I tried to explain that it is a term of endearment, but honestly, I kind of like that the little boy had her back. :)
This is amazing—my best friend and I JUST had this conversation last week. We both have teens/young adults and are both a hard nope on calling them babies! Which is probably why we’re friends. But also, I’m of the “good for her, not for me” school and everyone is different!
I was on the phone with my almost 90 y.o. Grandma the other day to say thank you for the birthday card she sent me for turning 40. I absolutely lit up when she answered and called me baby. I’ve also taken to calling not only my kids the nickname ‘babes’ but also their little preschool and 1st grade pals- as in ‘oh let’s put your helmet on first, babes.’ We have a pretty tight knit group of families and it somehow makes it even sweeter.
Life.
My father died almost 27 years ago, one week after his 60th birthday. (Cancer sucks!) I was 30 and when my husband traveled down to FL to see him for the last time – my dad was in hospice care in a nursing home at this point – my father could barely speak but he looked at him and said “Please take care of my baby.” It killed me. It still kills. It will forever kill me. But he meant it. I was married, I lived in Alaska, I had supported myself for years but still…until the end….I was his baby.
oh my gosh, colleen, that’s so beautiful.
The way I’m crying.
This made me miss and love my dad. I’m so sorry for your loss and thanks for sharing this.
Just so beautiful Colleen. Always and forever their/our babies. Thank you for sharing xx
I’m not crying, you are❤🩹
I read this and cried and then I read it to my husband so that I didn’t have to cry alone.
when I was in my 40s I got sick, and my 75 year old dad would drive to my house at 5:10am so he could drop me at the station – he didn’t want me to use my energy walking to the train, when I could use it to get better. We always need our dads, and they always need us to love them.
Just putting in a plug to respect the views of kids, teens and young adults who do not want to be called babies. Yes, I’m a mom to a teen and a tween, so I understand the parent perspective on this, but I’ve also been on the “kid” side of the equation, and it can get old. Don’t make your kids feel bad for growing up. How about we keep the “baby” talk to ourselves and out loud say “I love watching you grow!” ?
Thank you so much for this, Erin. I am “the baby” of the family and while I’ve tried to deal with that language with good grace, I’m not remotely babyish in any way, even in relationship to my parents. That role is long gone. The label might be meaningful to a parent or mother, but I have no affinity for it.
I love your thoughtful, balanced perspective on this, Erin. I was just thinking about how we ooh and ahh over baby photos of our daughter, which she likes to see too, but in making a mental note to ooh and ahh over her nine year old self just as much!
I am sure your intentions are good and you aim to be helpful here, but absolutely nothing in this illustration implies disrespect, or encourages parents to make kids feel bad for growing up, or advocates baby talk. It’s art about the complexity of motherhood, not parenting advice.
I’m completely with you, Erin! If parents want to use the term and their kids like it, that’s fine by me. But I don’t like being referred to as anyone’s baby and I don’t call my daughter my baby. She’s my wonderful, glorious six-year-old and I remind her how much I love having a six-year-old, just like I’ll someday love having a teenager and an adult daughter. I don’t wish she was a baby anymore, which is how this term sounds to me. But to each their own!
I totally get you! And both my kids have asked me, “why do you call me baby?” And once I explain that I’m not calling them *A* baby but rather that I’ll love and care for them forever no matter what because they are *my* baby… they’re like “cool” and off they go lol. If they ever said stop, I totally would… and then go cry a little but I would. I love them that much.
Thanks for bringing this up! As a teen, my mom would regularly say that her favourite years were when we were little and I found that hurtful and she’s never understood why. I also dislike my parents patronising me with “little child” or “little girl”. I am a 35 year old woman. My parents are quite controlling anyway, so if they actually treated me as an adult capable of making adult decisions I might find their endearments endearing.
Agree Erin, Sara and Louisa May.
Life is a fucking petrol bomb! How on earth does calling someone their baby make a kid feel bad for growing up? You must have been one hell of people pleaser and unlike any teen I have ever ever known. My nan buried two of two of her daughters after she turned 90, and they were her babies! When one of them spent months undergoign chemo, she fed her like she had when she came into the world… the same way she fed her first husband who died from the same cancer…Even when you are 76, if you mum is alive, you are her baby. To those mums who think they’re an expert because their kid is 6, wow you got a lot of learning to do and being upset by this is a tad ridiculous. I took this post as a reflection of how we feel when we love someone to the very core of ourselves- not the name we introduce our kids as…
Oh definitely! I still call my 5 year old “baby.” She has advised me that she is not a baby. I explained to her that I know she is a big girl, but she is still MY baby. 🥲
I call my 14 year old, my newborn. I got that from this site. He will always be my baby. Also, at my wedding that was 15 1/2 years ago, my dad said I will always be his little girl. I like that too. :)
I’m nearly 47 and my dad still greets me with “Hello, kiddo,” and it makes me smile. Trying to soak it up in this stage of fleeting life.
For life
Haha, I just sent a snap to my dear friend of 45 years whom I met in a prenatal birth class. The caption read “HOW is it possible that my baby has TWO teenagers?”
My husband is 35 and my Mother-In-Law still calls him “baby” in moments of sweet tenderness, difficulty, or illness. I find it so charming and it is clearly laying out the expectation for my own kids that I have no intentions of stopping ;) (Also, as a mom to multiple, I call everyone baby because I can’t always keep the names straight lol)
I call my adults kiddos (18 and 21) Baby Pearl 1 and Baby Pearl 2. They know I will always do that.
My 2 yr old and 6 yr old do NOT like being called babies since they’re in that “I’m a big boy/girl” period but they will be my babies forever
My baby turns 33 in a couple weeks. Sadly, I have made myself stop cutting up his grapes.
hahahahahahaha. Oh, Laura, as someone deeply in the throes of grape cutting, this made me laugh so hard. i know i am going to blink and she won’t need me to cut her grapes anymore.
Forever!
Forever but at some point I transitioned from my baby to my buddy and nowadays my best bud.
Also applies to dogs. 8 week old fluffy with razor sharp teeth=puppy. Almost 9 year old dog who now barely leaves the patio when it gets really cold=puppy
Our dog is something like 13 now and I still get him puppy cuts at the groomer because he is still a puppy
I was going to reply to say the same thing. In my heart, my kids will always be my babies but I don’t believe I’ve ever called them that in real life. My greying Black lab however will forever be referred to as our puppy, no matter how many times my husband raises his eyebrows at me for doing so.
My baby turns 24 in a few days. Yes, still and always my baby.
I have a cherished photo of me and my daughter soon after she had her baby, of her feeding him while I fed her!
On parental leave with my second baby and I feel this so deeply. <3
Aww <3 A core memory is being in the throws of chaos with my first newborn and being confused why my mother was fussing over me instead of the tiny, helpless, crying person. She tsked and said “That’s YOUR baby. You’re MY baby.”
*sob*
This is absolutely beautiful❤️
my mom too <3
welp
My mom said my grandma told her, “I know you’ll take care of the baby but I’m here to take care of you.” She did the same for me and I’ll do the same for my girls. ❤️
This is so sweet, I might have to adopt this memory as my own
So beautiful. They’ll always be “our”babies parenting the next generation of babies xx
Laughed! Not left! Totally different story if I walked way! Darn typos!
This is so my mom brain! On a recent family trip my boys (14 &17) we’re walking ahead of my husband, and I and they were joking around together and had just been being very good brothers the whole trip and it just filled my whole entire mama heart with love for them and happiness at their sibling bond. So I turned to my husband and I said “gosh just look at those babies! I love them so much“ and my husband looked around and said “what babies?” legitimately looking for actual infants. Which to be fair I also adore a cute baby so it is not insanity for him to think I might comment on the cuteness of a baby. I don’t know. I just left and said “Our babies!” In my heart, they will forever be my babies
laughed not left! darn autocorrect typos! different story if I walk away
hilarious both ways!
So true! It’s 7am in New Zealand and I’m feeding my seven month old. Thank you for starting my day with that thought.
It always bothered me when my friends called their little one “the baby” as they were walking around saying words. Now that I have my own I get it! “The baby” of all the babies turns 1 in a few weeks!
My 4 year old always asks, “Why are you calling me a baby?” And I told him that even when he’s 44 he’ll still be MY baby. I think my 7 year old accepts this as one of those things you have to tolerate from your mother. 😉
I call toby “my very first baby” and anton “my babiest baby.” the other day, anton came into my room in the morning, and I said, “hi! who’s that?” and he said, “you’re babiest baby!” so they like it too I think :)
Oh Joanna that is so sweet of Anton!
This is the sweetest bit of perfection. Whole motherhood memoirs contained in that toddler line— the pride! The changes! The settling in to long term parenthood… makes me happy-teary. Michelle, you have a poetic way with charts!
Aww thank you so much <3
Did this make anyone else think of Blake Shelton’s song, “The Baby”? I’m not well-versed in country, but a college roommate made a Sad Country Songs mix cd for me. I rediscovered it a few years ago, after becoming a mom, and listened to it. Made me “cry just like a baby”. My baby turns 8 this week — they still held my hand yesterday when we crossed the street.
My daughter was born eight weeks early and has always been rather small for her age. She is two now and has been called “Baby plus her name” since day one at her daycare and it is said so tenderly and lovingly by her beloved teachers in every interaction, call or email that I hope they call her that till her VPK graduation (and boy oh boy, what a gift to feel to my bones that she will always always always be my baby child, sob.)
Mich! =) I knew before I scrolled it was you. Love to see you here.
Forever
I turn 45 this year, and my mom always says this to me: “You’ll always be my baby.” When she came into the hospital room to meet her first grandchild, she told me that she felt compelled to check on me first before meeting the next generation. I don’t think your baby ever stops being your baby. I tell my kids that too – “you’ll always be my baby, even when you’re 45.” And my charming son reminds me that I’ll be 81 or even dead. Which changes the conversation altogether :)