9 Meals to Bring to Friends Who Need a Boost
What are your favorite TLC meals? You know, those “can-I-bring-over” recipes you make for loved ones who need a little support. I’ve been thinking about this recently, thanks to Zahra Tangorra’s new memoir, Extra Sauce, about “the great meals and great loves” of her life. “Cooking is such a powerful way to care for someone,” she told me. “In an ever-more-technological world, cooking is an ‘analog’ love language.” Below, Zahra and eight other food writers share the dishes they bring to loved ones…
Zahra Tangorra, chef and author of Extra Sauce
“Lasagna is what I always make when someone loses a parent, has a baby, or just needs a little extra warmth. It’s a simple, heartfelt meal, and as I layer in the pasta, sauce, and cheese, it feels as though I’m layering in a simple, heartfelt message: I care about you. Personally, I lose my appetite when I’m grieving or weathering a breakup. But lasagna is sturdy. It can sit in the fridge or freezer and reheats very easily.”
Eric Kim, author of Korean American and the forthcoming Spaghetti Junction
“A vegetable-loaded pasta salad is my go-to TLC meal. When making a dish for friends in need, I aim for three things: 1) something that can be eaten cold or at room temperature; 2) something that requires a lot of vegetable prep and knife-work, because those are often the most time-consuming parts of cooking; 3) something that won’t take up too much fridge space. I love this pasta salad recipe, which is packed with a rainbow of crunchy veggies.”
Melisa Denizeri Orley, writer of Dream Dinner Guest
“There’s something comforting about a moist cake sitting on the counter for a few days — one you can go back to for a slice, as needed. I drop off cakes (they’re also easily transported), for both celebratory occasions and hard times. This Buttery Orange Tahini recipe is my favorite — to me, a spoonful of tahini is pure comfort. I top it with whipped cream and orange zest for a delightful little zing.”
Alex Beggs, food writers and CoJ contributor
“I’ve often found that the people I love who are having babies or Going Through It are far from my kitchen. That’s when I mail them a box of cheese from Zingerman’s. (My recs: Brabander Goat Gouda, Cabot Clothbound Cheddar, Artisanal Manchego). Who doesn’t want a BOX of CHEESE? Doctors should prescribe it.”
Ella Quittner, journalist and author of Obsessed with the Best
“I like to bring something savory and something sweet. I aim for recipes with a long freezer-life, in case they’re already overloaded with food. On the savory side, I’ll make a sheet-pan batch of the Green Mac and Cheese from my book (I also like this one from Smitten Kitchen). For something sweet, I’ll make a double batch of my Malted Cookie Dough Chocolate Chunk Bars, since those can stay in the freezer forever and never decline in deliciousness.”
Kaitlyn Teer, Big Salad newsletter editor
“My theory is that quiche is the perfect meal for people who are convalescing, grieving, or postpartum, because it works for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. It’s also a dish that pretty much anyone can make, especially if you start with a pre-made crust. Here’s my no-recipe recipe: Grease your pie pan and transfer the crust (I buy the frozen two-pack from Trader Joe’s). Pre-cook the filling, starting with sautéed onion and garlic, then add a veg combo (I usually do frozen peas and broccoli, with chopped spinach). Whisk 8-10 eggs with a splash of milk, and season with salt and pepper. Put your veggies in the pie crust, pour in the eggs, and top with shredded cheese or crumbled feta. Bake at 350°F for 20-25 minutes, until the eggs are firm and the crust is golden. Done!”
Klancy Miller, author of Cooking Solo and For The Culture
“Easy answer: Cookies! I usually make chocolate chip (a classic) or ginger-molasses cookies, which are a favorite among my friends.”
Melina Hammer, author and writer of Stories From Catbird Cottage
“Grain salads are great in these situations. This is my personal favorite, but the best thing about grain salads is their easy versatility. Prefer brown rice over wheat berries? No problem. Just use similar elements as you assemble the dish, and you’ll have a crowd-pleaser: something earthy (the grain), something zippy (like red onions), then juicy and crunchy elements, like radishes, nuts, and herbs. Finish it with salty crumbled feta and creamy avocado, and it’s a nourishing feast.”
Kelsey Miller, Cup of Jo senior editor
“My bring-over food is Scottish flapjack. I especially love to make this for new parents, because it’s delicious and filling and you can easily eat it with one hand. I also like to make a big batch of homemade granola. I actually did this for myself, the week before my daughter was born (#nesting). It came in handy during those early wild early weeks. My husband and I would scoop cupfuls in the middle of the night and snack on it during feedings. I use this recipe as a starting point, and play around with mix-ins.”
Do you have a favorite “bring over” food for loved ones? And congrats to Zahra on her new memoir, which inspired this post!
P.S. A big pot of self-serve baked beans or warming soup would be GREAT to bring over, and how to write a condolence note.
(Top photo by Curated Lifestyle/Unsplash.)
Comments
94 commentsWhen we were sitting Shiva after my beloved grandpa passed, my bestie turned up – with her father and her 1.5 y/o, just 3 weeks after losing her own mother, and brought me a vegan quiche. She knew I’d be the only vegan in that huge house full of grieving people, and that I’d been sustaining myself on salad and cake while taking care of as many people as I could at once. I’ll never ever forget that. I messed up on the food front when her mother passed; I brought florentine cookies. But when her youngest – a summer baby – was born, I sent ice cream, with cones and chocolate syrup, and I think that ate. When my other bestie’s brother passed suddenly, at a very young age, I took advantage of the fact we live nearby – I’d bike over every day and make her a fresh chopped salad with a lot of tahini on top, and make sure she got that and some juice and water in her. I hope I can just be helpful like that whenever someone I love needs me…
“something that requires a lot of vegetable prep and knife-work, because those are often the most time-consuming parts of cooking” – Eric Kim gets it!
Now that I think of it, I have delivered a ton of food over the years. My specialties: shortbread, baked in a mold; homemade bread; chicken soup, also cheddar broccoli soup; sausage and peppers with rolls; complete turkey dinners, plus more stuff like this….. Also, once when a friend was going through an especially tough time with her teenager (a REALLY tough time; substance abuse, school dropout, incarcerations) I brought her a large box full of several cookie doughs with directions, plus trims, toppings, icing and disposable baking trays. She would leave her job to come home for lunch and I suggested she allow one batch of dough to come to room temperature so she could quickly bake cookies after work (she worked in a school so was getting home around 3:30). Being able to stock up on baked goods for Christmas AND fill the house with that fragrance was a real treat for her, and was greatly appreciated. Something a bit different for someone who wasn’t actually sick or recovering, at least not physically. Food for the soul!
My husband was hospitalized for several weeks for multiple major surgeries. My sibling brought me books to read for all that waiting around. They also gave me a generous Uber Eats gift card. It was wonderful! We could order dinner after long hospitals days. When we finally came home, my neighbors brought us dinner for two weeks. So lovely. One couple brought chicken schwarma and fresh watermelon. That watermelon hit the spot. Same neighbors brought a huge batch of Ina Garten’s lemon chicken cutlets with arugula! Delicious!! And lasted for several days. My brother just got out of the hospital. I’m taking them a pot of Avgolemeno soup, a loaf of homemade bread and an apple feta salad, also brownies and blueberry muffins. Good food truly warms the heart and soul!
I have delivered many meals this year and I STILL have a hard time finding things that work! I’ve done chili, chicken tortilla soup, green pasta, quiche Lorraine, and my husband has made different curries. I think curries and chicken tortilla soup were best. I also have made the lemon parm quinoa salad from Caro Chambers and that’s great. I think cut up fruit seemed to be the biggest winner of all. Maybe I should just do bagels and schmear if they aren’t gf or df. Love that idea and seems like people could always freeze the bagels they don’t use and cream cheese stays good for a long time in the fridge.
I grew up in rural Georgia, at a time when people paid condolence calls on a grieving family, and brought food. After a death in my family, the thing I remember most vividly is that a friend arranged delivery of two wooden cases of Coca-Cola (in the little green bottles). Suddenly, we had effortless beverages to serve all those callers. This was almost 70 years ago, and I still remember that gift with gratitude.
I moved across the country when I was pregnant with my first child (!!!) I didn’t know anyone in our new hometown and our sweet neighbor who was pregnant with her third child took me under her wing. She added my husband and me to her meal train once baby arrived. I will never forget the day a lovely woman brought over a homemade turkey pot pie with crimped homemade crust, AND homemade chocolate pudding with coconut milk. To be loved on by strangers changed my life and made me (and my new family) feel ao loved and seen.
I love making breakfast dishes for this sort of occasion. Who doesn’t love breakfast? This recipe for a bagel casserole is SO good and reheats well. I’ve made it with gluten-free bagels and meat-free, so it’s certainly customizable. https://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/food-network-kitchen/bagel-breakfast-casserole-3814175
All lovely ideas. I’m currently on a soft-food-only diet for 3 weeks while healing from an oral surgery and I can tell my friends care a lot but are totally stumped on what to offer me! Believe me, I’m stumped too. Lots of yogurt and mashed sweet potatoes….
I would add applesauce, soft scrambled eggs, avocado, soup, refried beans, hummus, cottage cheese – just to mix it up, if any of those are possible! And smoothies!
Pudding!! I also had oral surgery and though sugary, pudding is very nutrious with the eggs and dairy. Good luck healing. Oral surgery is no fun
I went through this with a loved one (for 2+ months!) and along with the other suggestions, a regular blender or immersion blender can be your best friend in this situation, especially if you have to be careful to avoid small bits of food getting stuck in stitches. You can blend almost anything into a smoothie (greens, fruit, dairy or nut milk, nut butters, small amounts of silken tofu even if you don’t like tofu, protein powder, hemp seeds and ground flax seeds once stitches are out). We did a lot of frozen peaches/mango/banana during stitches (no tiny seeds) and added various berries afterward. Same with blended soup (including just about any vegetable you can think of, nuts, grains, beans/lentils). It really expands your options and helps so much with getting balanced nutrition and enough calories while you heal. Plant-based food blogs are great because they have soup recipes that incorporate things like cashews and walnuts. Even if you aren’t a bean or lentil fan in usual times, it’s pretty easy to hide them in blended foods. Once solid food was okay, I cut vegetables up smaller than usual before cooking, cooked them a little longer than usual, and added mild vegetarian curries and slightly overcooked grains and pastas with various sauces. Also batches of oatmeal frozen in portions to reheat. Wishing you a speedy recovery!
Sending healing thoughts your way! My daughter recently experienced a traumatic injury to her mouth and had a similar liquid diet for a few weeks. Our most creative win was mixing her favorite cereals with milk to get soggy overnight in the fridge, and blending it in the morning with Greek yogurt or PB for extra protein.
i had lots of pureed tomato soup when i had my wisdom teeth removed!
When we had our baby, my wife’s aunt worked at a local, higher-end grocery store and delivered us the MOST incredible platter of assorted cheeses from their cheese department, like all the ones we’d normally drool over but not buy, like legit 20 different ones. It felt so luxurious and we felt so loved!
I would probably do a dozen of these, pre-wrapped for the freezer, along with a box of homemade brownies: https://tornadoughalli.com/easy-croissant-breakfast-sandwiches/ Can eat for breakfast or an easy toaster oven moment away from a comforting breakfast-for-dinner.
Receiving anything is lovely but I think Ella Quittner’s would be the most comforting for me: a healthier but still cheesy green mac and cheese and something sweet to finish. If I am too upset to think about food, this will be both easy and indulgently comforting. I’ll have a healthy salad next week when the moment is not so raw. But huge thanks to anyone who brings me anything. My elderly landlady lives downstairs and will occasionally leave covered dishes for me on the steps – it is the sweetest and makes me feel so loved. She is GF like I am so I will leave her something like a bag of GF pretzels only found in another town I often pass through – she doesn’t drive far from home so she is always so thankful. Win-win
Post partum I was lucky to have my mom repeatedly drop off tons of chicken salad (curried, with raisins, which luckily my husband hates so it was all mine), oatmeal lactation cookies, and fruit salad. I could not get enough fruit salad! I needed the hydration and the fiber and could not even imagine washing and cutting up fruit at that time. When in doubt, bring fruit salad!
For meal trains I do a rotation of the following: Bagels & cream cheese from our local shop, rice krispie treats, lemony lentil soup, cut up veggies, baked oatmeal
Love these topics! I have been on the receiving end of wonderful meals when I had two babies and I try and remember that when I bring meals to folks. Some things I’ve brought in the past: frozen beef and chicken pies, lentil soup (love the recipe from Sprouted Kitchen), peanut butter chunk oatmeal bars (recipe from Sally’s Baking Blog – whole wheat, egg free, good fibre!) and love to bring some fresh in season fruit. :)
My brother and his husband brought us food every week for the first 6 weeks of my daughter’s life. An entree, a side, and a dessert. It was absolutely incredible and I have never felt so taken care of and loved than when I fed my daughter at dawn and then pounded a slice of my brother’s homemade chocolate babka after.
After my son was born, our friends and family were incredibly thoughtful—dropping off casseroles, meal gift cards, and plenty of lasagna. We appreciated all of it, but the one that really stuck with me came from a coworker (very much a bachelor at the time). He showed up with an assortment of breakfast cereals, granola, fresh strawberries, and a jug of milk, all tucked into one of those random leftover Costco boxes—honestly, it made me smile. He said he wasn’t sure what to bring, but it turned out to be perfect. We had plenty of dinner covered, but nothing for breakfast, and that simple idea felt so thoughtful and practical. Ever since, a “breakfast box” has been my go-to for meal trains—whether it’s for a new baby or even during times of loss. Sometimes, all you can manage is a bowl of Cheerios, and having that on hand can mean more than people realize.
Breakfast is also my go-to for new parents! I remember those long nights finally drawing to a close with the dawn and the hopelessness that came with now needing to make decisions about feeding myself while sleep deprived. Aussie bites or a big bag of granola are my favorites. I usually tuck it in alongside whatever dinner I bring.
when I was in that phase of life where people were having babies I used to include a pint of ben & jerry’s whenever I dropped off a meal. when I had my first newborn, one church lady brought me a tub of chicken salad and some croissants, and that was divine. I thought it was weird at the time; I was living in the South, newly, and didn’t get the chicken salad culture there. then I got it.
So many fabulous ideas! I’m glad people remembered breakfast, because it’s often forgotten. After my brother-in-law died in an accident, one of our high school teachers brought us bread, eggs, juice, and other breakfast food, and TOILET PAPER! My in laws aren’t organized at the best of times, we had a houseful of people, and other people coming, so tp was an inspired addition.
My dad still talks about how impactful it was when someone dropped off toilet paper & paper plates/disposable silverware. His family is from small town USA & people VISIT when someone dies. Paper products are such a gift amidst the chaos of funeral planning & extra visitors.
More of a send over than a bring over but the absolute best thing I got after my son was born was a grocery delivery from my high school BFF across the country. It was snacky and indulgent with a little bit of everything, and I could eat it all with one hand at room temp. Fancy crackers, short bread cookies with chocolate, some good cheeses, grapes, granola bars and other random perfect bites . It was like someone had de-fogged and then read my mind
My formula: Something that reheats well (like meatballs in tomato sauce) + something fresh (chopped salad or cut fruit) + something you can eat any hour of the day (banana bread, granola, etc.) My MIL left a bowl of cut watermelon with mint in my fridge when I came home from the hospital with our new baby and I still feel teary thinking about how care for I felt in that moment.
The delivery that stands out the most from our daughter’s birth 13 years ago was a tub of cut-up pineapple (along with a dinner I do not remember). I was so tired I could not fathom cutting up fruit.
This easy pasta bake is another go-to. Much easier to make than lasagne, can double so you have one for your own dinner https://alexandracooks.com/2025/01/18/simple-baked-pasta-to-bake-now-to-bring-to-a-friend-to-save-for-later/ As a many time meal train recipient I can attest that anything at all is such welcome respite. Food is love. But if you do have a little extra time, I know so many moms, including me, who crave fresh fruit. Already sliced or in a fruit salad, something I’ll always remember. Along with the pint of fresh cherry tomatoes for snacking, and the pickled veggies someone sent alongside the saucy rice dish. Anything bright fresh and zingy felt so welcome alongside the hearty goodness I also needed and craved.
Fruit! This makes me think of Kids Eat in Color’s founder, who makes a point of encouraging moms to enjoy the full container of raspberries for themselves. I couldn’t agree more!
This looks incredible. I would sub crumbled tempeh for the meat and use GF pasta. Mmmm!
My go-to is chicken tortilla soup with lots of nice toppings like cilantro, radishes, cheese, tortilla strips and avocado prepped and ready to go. I like to also pack corn muffins and watermelon cut into big chunks alongside.
My go-to meal for new parents is a Greek-inspired chicken bowl. Chicken, peppers, and red onion roasted on a sheet pan. Dice the chicken, prep some chopped kale dressed with olive oil, lemon juice, and salt. Deliver with rice (I use microwaved rice), hummus, pita, feta, and olives. People can assemble their own bowls as they choose, and kids will usually eat at least part of it!
My mom has a story about when HER mom, my grandma died, and someone came over with a single serving of delicious salad. Something about that is so touching- no fridge overwhelm, a small amount of nourishment. I try to consider that when sending food to people in need. Too much can be hard to navigate, too!
I love cooking for others and bringing food, and will happily stock friends’ fridges and freezers for tough times, but I will die on the hill that the #1 gift you can give new parents is NOT food – other people will do that! – but a giant party pack of compostable plates/cups/utensils (you can get them from Costco and the like, or online). In the postpartum haze the last thing I wanted to think about were dishes… and then a package of plates arrived from my cousin, a gentle reminder that it was okay to make things easier for myself. This also makes a great gift for that coworker that you don’t really know personally but everyone is getting small gifts for their maternity/paternity leave… ;)
My favorite comment thread! I love bringing baked ziti with a salad (everything in disposable containers for ease) or chicken cacciatore with mashed potatoes and string beans. In winter, butter chicken is always a winner and I have a recipe that is GF/DF which is handy for those with dietaries. I remember being post-partum first time around and did not factor in how eating SO MUCH pasta would not be great for my digestive system (IYKYK) and one kind, seasons professional mother brought me a giant basket of fresh fruit and I just wept. It was exactly what I needed after all the pasta haha! I also remember my bestie showed up at my house the day before my in laws were coming to stay with us and our 5 day old son and she had MY chicken cacciatore recipe in her slow cooker and a mop and cleaned my whole house. Reader, again I WEPT. I pray we all find community like this or can be this for those around us.
lasagnalove.org is a non profit operating in a number of countries that links up lasagne makers with those who need a little bit of layered pasta love. I highly recommend getting involved.
I came to say this! I’ve been involved for about a year now and it’s so easy to just pick a timeframe that works for you. I’ve been able to brighten someone’s day. And truly easy – if you eat lasagna yourself, you can just double the batch, make one for your house and one for theirs. I recently got a “recap” email from Lasagna Love with the stats of how many families/people my family and I helped since we started, and it made me tear up.
Felt very validated reading Eric’s point about veggie prep while I had a chopped salad for lunch today. It is so time consuming!!
I’ve bookmarked so many recipes. This would be the best potluck ever!
Texan here! I make street tacos. Handheld tortillas with shredded chicken or beef, spicy black beans, and a tub of guacamole. Easy to eat while nursing a baby, holding a hand, laying on the couch, swirling the pit of despair. Tacos are great because people can put the exact ratio of ingredients they want in their taco. Tacos are so personal! It feels good to exert a little control when everything is overwhelming!
I frequently make the famous (or at least to me it’s famous) chickpea stew from Alison Roman. It’s easy, warm, filling without being overly heavy for folks going through it. A friend once brought me a vietnamese bun inspired situation – noodles, a bunch of prepped veg and a sauce. Lots of classic grief meals (lasagna for example) are really heavy, which can be great, but it felt nice to have something lighter and healthier and nourishing.
OMG someone gave me a quiche after I had my first baby, and it was HEAVEN! That and a big bowl of cut up fruit became my go-to for new parents. For someone going through a hard time, I default to UberEats because dinner foods feel so fraught (preferences, dietary restrictions, etc.). But, I love the idea of a pasta or grain salad. And cookies, can’t go wrong with cookies!
Chili (with a few toppings) and cinnamon rolls. Yup. It was what our genius cooks at my exceptional school cafeteria made once a month on Fridays when I was growing up, and the combination is absolutely magical. One friend told me it was the only meal her kids actually ate during their whole meal train season.
Our school served cinnamon rolls with spaghetti!
Are you from Nebraska by chance? Cafeteria classic for me too!
ohhhhhhh, cinnamon rolls. genius. does a more comforting, special food exist??
What I drop off changes dramatically depending on the circumstances. For celebrating a new life I do lots of ready to eat fruits and veggies with homemade hummus, frozen breakfast burritos, and Molly Yeh’s no bake chocolate chip granola bars all in containers I do not want back. For bereavement, I usually have takeout delivered hope it smells so good they can’t help but eat at least some. I usually go with Thai or Indian because even mediocre versions are still likely to hit the spot and reheat well. In a sea of delicious and well intentioned casseroles, a colorful curry tends to offer a palate cleanser.
haha “containers I do not want back,” yes! I still have the green milk glass bowl one church acquaintance brought food to me in when my 13 year old was born. was too embarrassed to return it for years, and then we moved.
Rice is my food love language. I usually make pollo guisado or chicken curry, daal, or beans and a pot of white rice with sides of chopped cilantro, limes, crunchy diced cucumbers to top it all off. It’s just so comforting during a difficult time.
I always go with a rotisserie chicken, a loaf of fresh bread, some mixed greens and a dressing. It gives everyone the chance to use it or pick at it for days. And always fresh flowers or a potted plant.
So thoughtful and great!
My go to is shepherd’s (or cottage) pie! When I’ve needed meals, people always bring lasagna, which I adore…but after 1.5 weeks of it, my love wanes. Shepherd’s or cottage pie is easy to make and so well received!
After I had my first baby, my neighbor brought over a delicious meatloaf, for the iron, she said. It was the best one I’ve ever had, and I spent a few years afterward recreating it. We are not huge red meat eaters but I still make it once per winter or so. If I bring dinner to someone in the summer, I often bring Smitten Kitchen’s Poolside Sesame Slaw, with some TJ’s Soyaki-marinated grilled chicken thighs, sliced up. I use some kind of TJ’s cruciferous veg salad mix as the base so it keeps well. In the winter I often do a stir fry with chicken and veggies, over rice. Other than the meatloaf, I don’t have super strong memories of what people have brought post-baby, but I do remember the feeling of being cared for. So it may ultimately not matter all that much what food we show up with, just that we show up with food. :)
Ottolenghi’s cauliflower cake! (Very eggy, almost quiche like but no crust) What’s not to love? Good dose of veggies and protein, vegetarian, spice levels can easily be adjusted, it freezes very well, reheats in the microwave (unlike a quiche) and is probably glutenfree (but i never checked). Also: toddler approved! It was my favorite midnight snack while nursing and I’ve since enjoyed it at all hours/mealtimes of the day, as have many of my friends, family and neighbours.
My bestie made that for me after both my kids and it is such a happy memory. It is utterly perfect at any time and any temperature.
After I had my baby, a friend dropped off a small cooler on my front porch full of fresh veggies, cleaned and cut up with a few homemade dips. 24 years later, I still remember that as incredibly helpful and thoughtful in my early days of nursing a new baby.
I second the quiche idea! Also, if you use the premade in a pan frozen crust, it can fit perfectly in a gallon ziplock bag for freezing!
After my second was born, my SIL brought over my nana’s meatballs. I wanted to cry with joy – a familiar food that I loved and definitely couldn’t swing making on my own.
If cupofjo had a way to like comments, I would be liking everyone’s comments to this post!! Fabulous responses! :))
I’m from the South and when someone dies, people bring fried chicken by the ton, which is often delicious, but gets heavy. I try to take friends in need a deli tray with meat and cheeses and bread and some potato salad for a break from the chicken. It’s easy and people seem to like it. Also popular, some paper plates, plastic ware and napkins and extra toilet paper to help when you have a crowd in your house.
https://kristineskitchenblog.com/quinoa-sweet-potato-enchilada-casserole/?utm_source=Pinterest&utm_medium=organic This is in my work fridge right now, to take to my friend who just had a baby. It’s so yummy, and can make vegetarian (or vegan, if you sub the cheese) burrito filling. Or, with egg added, delicious breakfast burrito filling. Everyone likes it. I usually just use canned enchilada sauce & skip the first step. xox
I adore this post – I have never met a meal train I didn’t hop on! My favorite tip – having been on the grateful, receiving end – is to plan your gift a few months down the road. Like when the new parent’s leave ends and they’re back to work is also when a meal is super welcome. Or when someone grieving a loss has eaten all their other freezer meals and you can show up and and let them know they are still in your heart. I love to give either chili & cornbread, or baked ziti – either can freeze easily. Usually with a jar of Greek Salad on the side (keeps for a few days). A great dessert I like to do for new parents is chocolate-dipped strawberries – luxurious and fresh!
I frequently make quiche, and 8-10 eggs with a splash of milk might be yummy, but it ain’t quiche without a custard. I do 1 C heavy cream and six eggs. Bake low and slow at 325 and it is a creamy delight.
Anyone else want to come to Kelsey’s house for dinner sometime? She sounds like such an amazing cook!
Right after my daughter was born, a friend brought me bagels and cream cheese and a giant bowl of fruit salad. She has three kids and knows all the Mom things – she knew i needed something I could snack on easily, eat with one hand, and thatt didn’t require any effort to prepare or consume. It was the best thing anyone brought me!
This is my go-to to bring! It’s so easy, can be eaten whenever, and who doesn’t love a good bagel??
I will do all the components of rice bowls along with a couple packages of microwavable rice. The recipes are veg forward and allow for a bit of choice. My biggest learning is to save plastic containers and put everything in those – along with a note to recycle when empty. I hate the idea of someone having to think about returning dishes
The day after my dad died, 15 years ago, my best friend from my childhood hometown came over to my mums house and brought Quiche Lorraine. She made the puffpastry herself which seemed like the most exklusive thing anyone has ever baked for me. Layers and layers of butter. So much love without saying much. A hug and lots of butter.
I have delivered meatloaf, mashed Yukon gold potatoes and steamed broccoli all in a largish aluminum foil pan that can be purchased at the dollar store.
My go-to is always tacos with shredded chicken and all the fixings to go with it + chocolate chip cookies. Mexican food is my favorite and everyone can make it how they want with beans, rice, guac, and tortillas, and chips.
I used to think that I had to make something myself if I wanted to bring a meal over for a friend. But, when my father in law died, someone brought over two dozen bagels with different cream cheese from a local bagel shop. It was perfect. Now, that is my go to food gift. You can eat it for any meal or snack and it is fine if you leave it out for a few days. A quick warm up in the toaster does the trick.
Great reminder, Sondra! My friend sent chocolate-covered strawberries from Edible Arrangements when I had my first baby and they were SO FRESH AND LUXURIOUS. Will never forget the experience of enjoying them!
For vegans or lactose free folks, I recommend a box of Rebel Cheese! Such a treat, I’m gonna ask for it for Mother’s Day.
Baked ziti! I like Alison Roman’s recipe on the NYT. Someone made this for me when I was post partum and I have adopted it and now bring it to anyone who needs a solid meal or is going through a thing. Reheats beautifully, freezes well, good cold. It’s a dream. I usually double the recipe and make myself a pan of it simultaneously.
Veggie-heavy peanut noodles (specifically from Caroline Chambers’ cookbook) has been a winner amongst friends. Serve hot or cold, it’s great for kids/toddlers (if you don’t add sriracha), and you can package the fixins separately (limes, cilantro, etc). When a family member had a traumatic hospital stay, a friend shipped a ton of healthyish and fun snacks for the waiting room. When our group was anxious and tired, trying new, extravagant snacks together was a little balm.
I’ve made Giada’s minestrone many times for friends in need, after a baby, etc. It’s simple to pull together and versatile; if your friend is a vegetarian, just leave out the pancetta/bacon and use veggie broth. Also freezes well. That and a crusty baguette are usually a welcome drop-off, I’ve found.
This is a great gathering of ideas. I would love to try out the malted cookies from Ella Quittner. If she’s following along, could she share what weights of flour and malted milk powder she would use for this recipe? I find my baking is so more successful if I can use weights instead of cups.
We checked her cookbook! flour = 200 grams malted milk powder = 120 grams
Thank you!!
When I had a miscarriage, my friend who Does Not Cook got us the equivalent of a Russian deli. Two quarts barley soup (one hot, one frozen), a container of blintzes, dark rye bread, and a pound of very good butter (“Because you need the good butter right now”). Another friend/co-worker pooled a food delivery gift card from my work. Even if you can’t cook, showing up is the number one thing. We still talk about how much it meant to us and how lucky we were to have such good friends in our time of need.
The Russian deli food sounds amazing in times of sadness or after giving birth. What a sweet, unique treat!
When I had a miscarriage my dear neighbor brought over Laurie Colwin’s Beef Stew. It was one of my family’s favorite meals and I had given her the recipe a few months back. It was so comforting for our family to have one of our favorite recipes.
Very good butter – love that idea! Fancier versions of staples are simple and can make such nice treats.
Thanks so much for sharing these tried and true recipes. I am sure many of them are the favorites with the stain marks on the paper from all of the times they have been used.
When I was three months postpartum, two of my friends brought over a charcuterie platter, wine, and sparkling water, then we had a happy hour while my baby was taking a nap. It was SO much nice and made me feel so included!
I love to bring meals to a friend in need. Some I have brought: Chicken on the bone baked over rice Salmon and baked ziti or quinoa salad Chicken stir fry and fried rice Tacos Always includes a fresh salad and dessert Washed and cut up fruit
My family Christmas dinner is baked ziti, homemade mac and cheese for my neighbor Lisa, and some form of bread pudding. I’m mentioning this because one of the greatest human beings ever, Marc Bittman, taught me one of greatest time-and-stress-reducing insights regarding baked ziti via his cookbook. You can add ricotta cheese straight into the tomato sauce, along with lots of mozzarella, when making baked ziti. In other words, you can get the flavor of lasagna without the layering of pasta, useful for making comfort food when there’s a time crunch. Incidentally, it is not a coincidence that my Christmas dinner for my family consists of crowd pleasers that are easy for me to make when I’m tired and stressed. For a discouraged friend, I’d probably do the bread pudding, which is based on my late Great Aunt Wilma’s master pudding recipe. That’s why everyone should keep a couple of Popeye’s biscuits in the freezer in case they need to make bread pudding at a moment’s notice.
Eric’s advice is spot-on. When my father died earlier this month, I requested veggie-heavy grain/pasta-type salads that could hold up well for several days in the fridge. We also really enjoyed all the sweets we got, but having easy veggies that we could just dump into a bowl and fork in our months without doing any chopping/prep was a godsend.
A box of veggies cut into batons and a good dip. Chopping veggies is the hardest and most time consuming thing no one has the physical or mental energy for on the best of days so it’s the one thing I assume anyone would appreciate when they’re going through life’s challenges. Plus some homemade cookies, for balance.
If I have the capacity to cook, I make the Best Lentil Soup (recipe from Cookie & Kate), a loaf of no-knead bread, and a batch of chocolate chip cookies or the cinnamon streusel coffee cake from the NYTimes. There’s something for every taste there, it’s nourishing but not heavy, and it all does well in the freezer. If cooking isn’t an option due to scheduling or whatever, there’s a local Italian place that does a frozen lasagna that is delicious. That and a loaf of focaccia – perfect comfort food.
In circumstances such as these, I follow my mother’s advise: she always said that homemade soup always hits the spot when delivered to friends and neighbors. My current favorites are Spring Minestrone with Pesto accompanied by Buttermilk Biscuits with Blue Cheese and Chives. Not only is soup the ultimate comfort food, in my opinion, but virtually any soup can be frozen for several months. My new idea is to put the two items in a TJ’s mini pastel tote bag since I went a little wild in stocking up when there was no limit at the store I shop at.
Yesterday I left soup at the door of dad and 2 little girls who just lost their mum. I also made soup for post partum mums. You can never go wrong with soup, even when you´re grieving and not hungry and you really need to eat something, then soup you can manage. It´s healthy and warming, and the kids always eat it too.