October 2, 2026
Grocery Shopping With a Baby
Hallie Bateman is a writer, illustrator and twin mom based in Cincinnati, Ohio. She’s the author of four books, including the bestselling What To Do When I’m Gone. Her Substack, HALMAIL, publishes weekly. You can follow her on Instagram, if you’d like.
P.S. Going from one kid to two and what parenting stage are you in right now?
Tags: comics
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96 commentsI have triplets, who are now 9, and I only recently started taking my kids grocery shopping because it was too much of a project before. When they were toddlers, we’d have to use two carts: one for the kids and one for the food. Then imagine six little hands reaching out and grabbing things. Once all three started crying, so my husband had to leave the store with the cart of kids so I could finish shopping, while the other shoppers looked at us like we were nuts. I can relate to the story because if now I take just one kid to the store with me, it feels like a vacation and is actually really enjoyable.
I’m a twin aunt, and I remember my sister sobbing about taking her twins to a baby meet up in the park that went sideways for her — “all the other moms only had ONE BABY, and I mean, how hard could THAT be??”
Being a mom of twins (a boy and a girl who are now 16 years old! ) I loved reading this and remembering when I took them both with me. 2 toddlers sitting side by side in the stroller eating is the cutest thing.
My sons are 3 and 5. This past summer, my husband and I started doing “splits” where, each Tuesday night we would each take 1 son for an evening adventure and switch sons the next week. The boys LOVED it, it was such a different experience each time, and there was much needed 1:1 time for all. They keep asking to continue it but I’m not sure how it will work during the school year.
Bonus if you get the cart that’s the race car! Tragedy if you don’t!
When my oldest was a toddler I had one of those fabric shopping cart seats to protect her from the cart germs. She used to look directly in my eyes, lift up the fabric and run her tiny toddler hand across the bare, germ-covered cart handle. It took everything in me not to burst out laughing at her blatant defiance. That toddler just left for college three weeks ago.
My triplets are 8 years old now. When I bring one kid anywhere, I am still shocked by how easy and breezy and beautiful things can be with only one- and I find myself missing the other two intensely!
Same! My triplets are 9. Whenever I only have one or two with me, it’s almost shocking how easy it feels.
YES ALL OF THIS! I have 2.5 year old twins and only just recently did I take one of them on a solo outing to the grocery store when he was home “sick” on a weekday while his brother was at daycare. I decided a Trader Joe’s outing was in order and it was SO FUN to be out with just one child! We had the best time. My husband and I really should split up more on the weekends, but it’s so hard when we want to use our limited free time doing something for ourselves, so one parent takes both kids instead. Raising twins is sooooo different than singletons!
Errands are great a way to show little ones their world. No phones. No tablets. Let your child observe their surroundings. It’s so important.
I was wondering if you noticed the difference or enjoyed taking one baby out and not getting the usual “OMG twins” comments from strangers? And if you felt the need to tell people you had another one at home? I don’t have twins, I have a 3 and almost 1 year old, but when I’m out with only one I find I’m tripping over myself to bring the other child up in conversation with people I meet. Like, the world must know I’m a veteran (lol) I BIRTHED TWO of THese!!!! It’s kind of embarrassing now I write it out. Anyone else?
Yes! Exactly this experience Laura! I don’t know why we feel the need to do this, but I definitely do it.
Laura, absolutely. I cannot stop myself from being like THEY’RE A TWIN. I think I want credit lol
YES I always tell people, “he has a twin brother!”
I think you deserve it! Haha
Even more embarrassing, I trip all over myself to tell people my third born was 10 pounds at birth. He’s almost four now, so it is absolutely not relevant to many conversations, but I feel myself saying it before I can stop half the time. What is that? *face palm*
Hahaha, well I was an almost 10 pound baby and my Mum will still tell people when it’s my birthday 36 years later. I suppose these babies are some of our biggest achievements in life and I everyone is far too nonchalant about how we grow other humans and then eject them from our bodies(!)
My youngest child was born in 2017. He went to the grocery store a ton as a baby, but then Covid caused an abrupt stop. When I finally took him back, it was like he had never been before. He couldn’t believe his eyes at all the people and food. And when we checked out and loaded up the conveyor belt, he fretted, “Mommy, why are they taking our things?” He thought the cashier was taking our groceries from us! Before the birth of the aforementioned child, I had his 3 older siblings – all 4 and under – wrangled in one of those car carts. I was so stressed and just trying to get some cream cheese when a lady tapped me on the shoulder and said flatly, “The one in the green shirt just threw up.” And she walked away leaving me with a full cart, 3 little ones, and throw up on the ground.
Also a 3yo twin parent! We find it fun (ha ha ha, maybe just slightly more tolerable?) to split up in the grocery store and divide the list in half — each grownup paired with one kid, meeting up together at the end at checkout. Or honestly, if we do two transactions, WHO CARES?
Twin mom here—I remember the first time I went grocery shopping with just one baby. I felt like I was on vacation! I told this to my husband afterwards since he stayed home with the napping baby. The workload and stress were much less than if both babies went shopping with me. Survival mode was real.
I found myself alone and able to grocery shop earlier this week and it did not go well. I had severe anxiety, I couldn’t make decisions, and I ended up just leaving. There wasn’t a specific incident , but just not having my baby with me gave me such an intense feeling. I think I’m at the point that I need to seek some counseling. I had such crazy separation anxiety (does that happen to the parent too?) not having my baby with me that it sent me into a panic. Hoping this gets better :/ Anyone else ever experience this? It feels too weird to talk to friends about.
Yes this has happened to me actually many times. I think you just really badly need sleep and rest. I used to tell my husband it was like I went to the store and forgot my arms or something. I felt so alien, couldn’t really think straight, I just kind of couldn’t shop. I ended up trying my best and then getting home to my son. You are normal and this will pass! I still miss my shopping buddies and they are now in second and third grade.
Anon, you are not alone. Everybody’s postpartum looks different, and it can be hard to compare and not necessarily feel like it’s a mirror of what you’re experiencing. Mine was confusing because everyone prepped me to watch out for signs of depression, but no one talked that much about anxiety, which is what I experienced. Short term counseling and medication, plus a focus on getting sleep, helped turn things around for me. I remember how weird and scary it felt to talk about, but I also remember that when I finally did talk about it to trusted people in my circle, it made it feel lighter to hold because it wasn’t a secret anymore. I hope things ease for you soon – you are doing such a good job to recognize something doesn’t feel right and try to find help. Sending hugs.
I experienced the same! I agree with Shel in that you probably need sleep and rest, and to make small trips one step at a time. It is easier said than done, but that anxiety went away as I got more sleep and really went away when I weaned from nursing. When I did go over that feeling, one time I dropped my son off with my mom to go get gas, and started talking to him while waiting at the pump, forgetting that he wasn’t there and laughed to myself! But again you aren’t alone, I remember when people would offer to watch him so I could have some me time, but I couldn’t enjoy it due to my anxiety without him. Looking back I wish I had someone to talk to/ normalize this- and I’m here to tell you’re normal and this to shall pass <3
I experienced this as well! Sleep and rest didn’t fix it, but an SSRI did ;)
That sounds really intense. Having a baby brings about the most unexpected things and we have a picture how things will be but living it can be a different story. Perhaps with more little bits of going out solo will help or with a friend to have support (and distraction). Counselling is helpful as they’ve seen these situations again and again and that alone helps you feel not alone. Much love
I agree with what’s been said already, but also here to have a gentle hot take. I experienced something similar with my first born. Lots of anxiety about leaving him with even the most trusted caregivers. Lots of well meaning family and friends pushed me to leave my baby more, as I clearly “needed it.” This resulted in a few terrible dates with my husband where I would spiral about being separated from the baby and take it out on him. So just here to say, if you don’t want to leave your baby… you don’t have to! (Unless you absolutely must, obviously). Don’t let societal norms pressure you to do what feels unnatural. Having a little baby at home won’t be your reality forever. Dates at home with special takeout and a new movie, while the baby slept nearby, were a much better solution for me and my marriage.
I was the same way with my babies, I just kept them close! Don’t feel bad about it, I think it’s very natural to want to be near them all the time when they’re little. Our bodies and nervous systems and hearts are just so intertwined for a long time after birth. Eventually they all got bigger and it feels very natural to spend time apart. Follow your instincts and no need to label it as anxiety if you feel uneasy being away from your young child. I also found baby wearing (front and especially back carry even from newborn age) so helpful for doing all the things I needed to do. You’re a good mama hen! Feel free to keep your chick close!
I wish COJ and this lovely community had been around when I was a young mama. I felt so many things and went through it all alone. It was even more horrible when I had to return to work and had to share my workspace with a narcissist who made my life a living hell while I was sleep deprived and missing my child and still feeling anxious and fog brained. That was a long time ago now and I have survived, but even 2+ decades later is good to know that other women hate being separated from their babies, that I was not alone even though I felt so very alone at the time.
The outpouring of love in these comments fills my heart. Thank you, COJ community for your kind and very helpful replies. I feel truly seen and am glad to known I’m not alone.
I love everything Hallie does. I’ve never met her, but she went to school with my sister in our tiny little town- i’ve been cheering her on for years. Our local paper has a section entitled “News of Record” where they list calls to law enforcement, arrests, etc. It’s as ridiculous as you would imagine small town America to be (in the best way). Hallie would draw these out and it’s one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen! https://www.instagram.com/sonoranor/
I am wiping my eyes laughing at these! Thanks for sharing
I love that this was a positive take on it vs drudgery. There are so many great moments with babies, toddlers, etc and they can happen in the grocery store! I also fully support shopping with kids so they see how food appears in the home, what choices you do/don’t make, maybe get an idea of money and costs at some point. They interact and see you interact with other shoppers, the cashier, the community in general. I view it similar to public transportation – it is valuable to expose children to spaces out in the community that aren’t just where other kids/families are.
Twin here with two sets of twin cousins (one set on each side). I thought our family was the only people who said singletons to refer to the non-twin cousins (who are outnumbered in our family on both sides, as well). loved seeing that in the comic. twins rule. xo
Yeah one of the amusing things you first hear when you become a twin parent-to-be, some medical staff or whatever mentions the phrase singleton, and it’s like ‘lololol is that actually the correct term for a single child!?!’
Twin mom here! At about 2yo we started taking our kids out solo on “dates” every Saturday and it was the BEST. I would take one and my husband the other for the day, and when we reunited at the end of the day, everyone was excited to see each other. (This was essential to surviving age 3 for us).
My boys will be 3 in December and just recently something shifted and it has gotten SO MUCH HARDER, OMG 3 is going to DO ME IN. Splitting them up to survive these hard times is a good idea – they feed off eachother so much.
Sarah- I have three kids, ages 11, almost 14 and almost 17. Age 3 was utterly insane. It is not you and it is not your child. It’s just the age. By the time our youngest was three my husband and I were able to laugh our way through it, but it was torture with my oldest because I really thought I was doing something wrong. (I confess that I have major perfectionist tendencies, which were not helping in this scenario!!!) Anyhow- their insanity is normal and it won’t last forever!
How coincidental, I was just talking about one of Hallie’s books last night! I bought the book What to do When I’m Gone, and ended up giving it to a friend when her dad died unexpectedly last year. We’ve been following a lot of the suggestions—made the fajitas together a few days after he died and she was JUST telling me last night that she wants to make the recommended soup for his one year death anniversary. Anyway, just wanted to thank Hallie because the book has been immensely helpful for someone I love!
Aw, Dre, it means the world ❤️ thanks for this lovely note!
My favorite part about taking babies/toddlers to the grocery store was what I called the “oh honeys” – older women who would tell me “oh honey, it gets easier,” or “oh honey, this is a hard phase” when one or more of them was screaming. I always found that hope and acknowledgment so much more helpful than the “enjoy every second.” Now that my kids are 17, 16, and 13, I am entering my “oh honey” stage and try to acknowledge the hard parts and give a glimpse into how it gets easier for the young moms in my life.
oh honey, it gets better and better and better!
I love this so much <3
I was in the grocery store with both my boys when they were about 5 and 8 and it was not going well … no screaming or melting down, just a whole lot of SHENANIGANS. I turned to an older woman in the produce department and said “I feel like I brought the circus to the grocery store,” and she said in the driest tone imaginable, “We’ve all been there.”
Man grocery carts are the best invention. I love having an out-of-the house activity I can do with my 3yo where he is strapped in but I get to walk around 😂
Love this. When mine were little (not twins but 3 close in age) the ones holding my hands broke away, leaving me to decide who to chase first with the one on my back. Stressful back then, funny years later, only because I managed to capture the runaways.
Hi mom!! Hope i wasn’t the runaway
This exchange is very cute
Oh my gosh, the chatter! It’s absolutely my favorite part, the chance to be as silly as you want, as whimsical as you want in the middle of your everyday life. Want to do a little dance in the aisle? Bring a toddler. Want to sing along to the songs playing over the speakers? Bring a toddler. Want to narrate your life like that one Emma Thompson movie? Bring a toddler.
Yessssss.
As a first time mom of a 9 week old, THANK YOU for sharing this perspective
Oh, I miss shopping with a baby. With my first child, that was my only social interaction. I went to Wegmans like 3+ times a week! I’d carry him in a ring sling (these don’t get enough attention as baby-wearing gear–they’re so easy and convenient!) and caress his head and talk about the pears, etc. I loved it and still remember it as one of the things about early parenthood that I really felt like I mastered.
Haha, due to my husband’s long hours I usually took my young kids shopping. Aldi grocery pickup through Instacart = best invention ever!
I always love Hallie’s posts because I too have boy/girl twins (15 months old). A few times, I have taken both of them to the grocery store by myself- it makes me feel like a superhero! They absolutely love Costco, and I love it because too because both can ride in the cart. Also Trader Joes , with one in the carrier and one in the cart, because people are so friendly and helpful there! Being in public with a baby, twins especially, really shows you the best of humanity in that complete strangers are so supportive and willing to help.
I used to do all my grocery shopping via curbside pickup. But once my baby (now 10 months) got to where he could sit up and be more aware of his surroundings, I realized I needed to find some things to go out and do with him, rather than just trying to fill the day in the playroom doing peekabo etc.! So now I take him on all my errands and he’s usually a big hit in stores. I figure it also lets him see new faces and experience other sensations. Occasionally he’ll draw attention to us by screeching at top volume for no apparent reason, but people have been kind about it!
Love these sweet comments! Parents and caregivers are heroes! You are all doing such important work 💗
Another quick plug for Costco: not only do they have carts with two child seats, but also they have the best register experience. At a normal grocery store the checkout experience is the hardest part with kids, because all the most enticing things are in a narrow aisle and you have to be on the basket side of the cart. At Costco you have plenty of space, no candy bars to turn down, and you can leave your kids in the cart as they go behind the Costco workers who are always chatty and happy with them, which is basically a 2 min babysitting break 😂
Ok we need to become a costco family ASAP!
Allll of this! It’s the best.
Not a twin mom, but I remember the first time I flew on a plane without a baby and the total exhilaration of it all. No internet (it was a while back), no texts, no emails, no interruptions — just me, a book, and someone bringing me snacks?! I remember looking around at the grumpy passengers in disbelief. What a gift this is! To be on a plane with no one to care for but yourself!
I felt the same way the first time I flew without a baby! They even made us de-plane and re-plane, and I wasn’t upset AT ALL! “What do you mean, I just need to walk myself off the plane, sit quietly for a bit, and then walk myself back on the plane, with nobody else to care for? No problem at all!!”
hahaha the absolute LUXURY of solo travel after previously flying with any tiny humans over any distance!
I feel this is my bones! I am going on a work trip later this month and flying without my toddler and I’m already excited to sit in silence, read my book, and have someone bring me a snack! The dream! It’s basically more of a vacation than any trip with a toddler.
I remember feeling the same way about going to the dentist the first time after I had a baby. What do you mean to lay in a chair for 45 minutes? Yes, getting your teeth scraped is uncomfortable but no one is demanding I breastfeed them for an entire 45 minutes! It’s like q vacation!
This could not be more real. Uninterrupted reading time ft. snacks.
Omigosh, SAME about the dentist. I so clearly remember the first time I got a teeth cleaning after my first baby was born. The hygienist put a blanket over my legs, I listened to music, she laid me back and paid some careful attention to me for 45 minutes — essentially it was a spa day.
One of my littles was a great helper when she was a baby. Liked to hear the narration and pointed to everything. This is the kid who is tidy, still helps out around the house and expresses her love through acts of service every chance she gets. One of my littles was a social kid who said hi to everyone at every store we visited and liked to chat with every single person who passed our cart. I never blushed harder than when one grumpy seeming older woman didn’t say hi back and my little one shouted “DON’T BE A WEENIE” at the top of her lungs to the amusement of everyone around us.
This is amazing! 😆 We say someone is a dingdong if they do something we don’t like (such as drive recklessly), my now six-year-old used to loudly say, “what a dingdong!”
Oh my gosh I laughed SO hard at this!!
The first time I went to the store with our newborn and 19 month old, I was worried about the logistics (Who’s in the cart? How do I get around the infant car seat taking up the entire TJ’s cart? Am I wearing the baby? Is the toddler loose? What if baby falls asleep in the car?) so I had my MIL come with me but pretend not to be there. That way if it started to fall apart, she could step in to help. It was a good first step! Have since been to the store with one, two, three, all four many, many times. And I actually like it, too!
I love this! I only have sons and I hope that I can be a supportive presence for my future DILs like this.
How lovely!! I love reading the support of you MIL the way you needed :) And honestly I love that idea, only step in if I need it as we are pretend strangers haha
She is such a model for MILs. I had a recent birthday and she gave me a heartfelt card about feeling like I am a daughter to her (she has two boys), and the feeling of family is mutual. It is possible! I am always looking for and inspired by parents supporting their adult children and their partners in loving, nonjudgmental ways!
doing stuff with kids is genuinely so fun! even when they’re a little spicy, kids are more fun than a murder podcast in my ears ignoring reality. 10/10 agree, take your kids places
Am I having a reading comprehension fail or is this saying you didnt shop at a grocery store until your babies were 2 years old? It was all delivery? This site is really a view into another world!
they did, they would just switch off going alone while the other parent stayed home with the two babies.
i feel like i didn’t take my first child to grocery stores much in the first 12-18 months either – a combination of concern about germs/covid (he was born in 2022), weird paranoia about him being too cooped up in a carseat for too long (since i read all the things about how his body needed freedom for proper physical development), anxiety about hunger/feeding while in public, and on and on. Plus it totally felt like a treat for me to go shopping for an hour while someone else looked after the baby at home.
Yes! Twin parenting early days was just pure survival. We didn’t do a lot of quite ordinary things for a long time. It took until they were 2 to take our twins on a hike. Twin parenting is so intense, you rule a lot of everyday things out as ‘too difficult’ to do with babies, just switch off and take turns and try to get through each day in one piece. And then eventually you do them and realize, omg, we can go on a hike! wow! haha
As a fellow twin mom, I can confirm that this was how it went for us too!!
@OurBeautifulWorld: It is, in fact, your reading comprehension error! The second sentence in the post clarifies exactly what you misunderstood! :) I teach literacy, and there are interesting conversations happening about how reading online really shuts down our comprehension because we’re so eager to *respond,* often in an emotional way. I sometimes catch myself doing it, too, and it’s such an interesting response to the immediacy of commenting. Wild phenomenon :) You might enjoy Hallie’s more political work (on her substack) about how she’s completely stopped using Amazon/how her family handles this economy as two freelance artists. She’s the best!
Can confirm that we started grocery delivery when I was 35 weeks pregnant with twins ($99/year for UNLIMITED deliveries – YOUR TIME IS WORTH MORE THAN THAT!!), so my boys have only been to the grocery store a handful of times in their lives at almost 3 years old (and always with Grandma as part of a “fun outing”). Everything with twins is harder, and more specific.
People always say to talk as much as you can to your baby, but I naturally just don’t have much to say! I was never the type to babble on and on to my babies. Even now that my kids are older, I oftentimes find myself driving them to an activity in silence, and I think, I should probably be talking to them?! But sometimes I just…don’t have anything to say! 😂
I wouldn’t worry about it if the atmosphere is nice and relaxed. Some of the best memories I have are running errands with my dad on Saturdays and just sitting in the car in silence or with his favorite music on :) I loved that he didn’t always need to talk or ask questions, especially as a teenager :D
I think it’s fine if it’s your natural family dynamic. My mom didn’t talk much when we were kids and I still prefer looking out the car and enjoying her presence to chatting away. But as my mom got older, she got more chatty and now I get all the deets on family and friends and a constant stream of consciousness babble whether I want it or not, lol.
Should also say that my kids often express that they want me to shut up haha. So you’re doing great!!!
I have 4 kids and took them all to Costco when my youngest was a baby. She was in the carrier and the other 3 were in the cart. I was waiting for a younger dude to pass so we could turn into the aisle, and he looked at me like I was a superhero and told me to go ahead. It gave me a boost I really needed. Thank you, random 25 year old in Costco!
Both of my parents are twins. I don’t know how my grandmothers did it. My maternal grandmother traveled with a six year old, a four year old and newborn twins from St. Paul, MN to England to join my grandpa who was stationed there while serving in the Air Force. My paternal grandmother had TWO sets of twins 16 months apart. TWO SETS. I don’t know how they survived. All love and props to parents of twins.
I’m a new twin mom (boys are 4.5 months old) and I feel so SEEN! Taking both boys even to go pick up the groceries feels like a hero’s journey. But taking one kid in to pick something up at Target? Practically a spa day. And if I’m ALONE? You better believe I’m stopping to get a coffee to sip in my car & listen to 10 mins of my audiobook in peace because I’m no dummy.
fellow twin mom here, having only one child lowers my stress levels enormously – and I think it goes both ways? Like the child knows its special and loves the attention (and lack of having to share) and behaves differently.. so we definitely had meltdowns on 1:1 excursions as well, toddlers be toddlers. (But you can pick them up and have only one child to soothe and not two..)
omg hi fellow twin moms!!!!! lolll one is totally a spa day ❤️❤️
This is absolutely true! We have 3 year old twins. We sometimes go on a weekend errand run as a family and split to two different stores – each parent takes a kid. And then we meet back up and chat about what each duo got and saw. It’s a nice routine.
Molly, Hallie’s twin comics are amazing! You will feel seen!
I was just telling a coworker how nice it was to grocery shop with a baby because my usual self-chatter could be made to look like chattering to my baby.
SAME. Without my kids, I end up mumbling to myself stuff like, “stop being such a weirdo and just pick out an eggplant already!”
Hahaha! Yes! Totally! My kids are now 7 and 10 so now I am back to possible self-muttering but boy do I miss those days pushing them in the cart and chatting away to them without a single care in the world or place to be. I didn’t know or care who was around me. Ahhhhh…..
Oh my gosh this is cute. Thanks for brightening up my day!