A Very English Novel That I Loved
I just finished reading the amazing novel Loved and Missed by Susie Boyt, which I think you guys would love, if you haven’t already read it…
The story follows Ruth, an English schoolteacher, whose daughter struggles so desperately with addiction that Ruth has stepped in to raise her granddaughter. You’re right inside Ruth’s mind — hearing her hopes, her fears, her everyday musings — in the same way that Elizabeth Strout’s novels drop you into someone’s brain.
Ruth’s inner monologue is funny and frank. On an annoying friend of a friend? “She was a low-level irritant, a gnat with inflated ideas about itself, a football team I would not wear the scarf of even if caught in a freak blizzard.” On growing up quickly? “When did I learn the more you wanted from people, the less they gave? Early on.” On finding joy? “She said it was important as you got older to take pleasure seriously. ‘You must grab it by the lapels,’ she said, ‘hail it like a taxi.’”
She’s also always trying to tamp down histrionics. She reminds me very much of my English dad and his stiff upper lip. For example, here’s a scene where she and her granddaughter are dealing with a staggering amount of stress, but she allows herself only a moment, even inside her own mind, of real upset and self-validation:
The other characters are similarly resolute. When her best friend Jean’s doctor recommends anti-depressants, here’s Jean’s response:
(For the record, I swear by my medication!)
I loved how the book really nails that British ethos of getting-on-with-it — and how it can both help and hinder. During an ongoing crisis, of course, it can make sense to stay calm and focus on practical solutions, but at some point, you do need to face your emotions in order to process and learn from them. I remember my therapist, during my divorce, asking me to please stop saying “onwards and upwards” every time I shared a sad anecdote. “Don’t move away from your feelings and grief,” she urged. “Instead, turn around and run through the storm.”
Still, however tightly the characters hold their emotions in check, their humanity comes barreling through. This moment took my breath away:
How incredible is that? And, for anyone who has lost someone special, don’t you agree?
I gobbled up every moment and would highly recommend if you want something to pull you right out of a reading slump.
Lastly, for comic relief, here’s a reel of British people saying no:
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Have you read this book? What else have you been reading lately? And have you read any other books that captured a certain cultural sensibility?
P.S. All our book recs in one place, and two questions: What would be the title of your memoir? And what’s a beautiful sentence you’ve read?
Comments
106 commentsYes! I read Loved and Missed last fall and recommended it to more people than any other book I read last year. It was the start of a stretch of great reads for me—ideal for fall: Lily King’s Five Tuesdays in Winter, Ocean Vuong’s Emperor of Gladness, Meg Mason’s Sorrow and Bliss, and Maggie O’Farrell’s The Hand That First Held Mine. They’re all a cup of sadness and two cups of love.
I just finished Loved and Missed after seeing this post. Lovely writing, I read it in less than 2 days. I’ll be looking for her other books.
Same here. Bought, started, finished this novel this past weekend. I laughed and I sobbed.
Just read John of John and WOW. I’ve been going through Booker Prize nominees and this one swept me off my feet. I read the last quarter of it in the gym, on the edge of my seat. I fell so in love with the characters it was twisting me in knots!
This book is so special. One of my all time favourites.
I totally agree with the need to continue to engage with the dead, possibly as much for their sake as our own. After two years of grieving over my very unengaged and emotionally distant father’s death, I felt like we worked through a lot of issues together, mostly related to me forgiving him and also wishing I was had somehow been more capable of being able to build a bridge (my sister was able to! but it was very different for me, the oldest). Of course in the end there is nothing to forgive and I feel like unless I’m imagining things, he has helped me and possibly continues to and been an even better father from beyond. I guess I won’t know until I am in the next realm, what ever that may be. (I am certain there’s more, for many compelling reasons.)
Oh I loved this book SO much!!!
I keep telling people to go see Operation Mincemeat – and one person responded that you need to appreciate British humor to like it. That had not occurred to me, but if you haven’t seen it and you like British humor, go see it! I’ve seen it 3 times and am trying to figure out when I can see it again. There was a great column in the NYT by someone who had seen it 13 times and couldn’t figure out why. It is just oddly so joyful – bc of the content, the production, and the ensemble.
The thing that I just love about this post is your photos of book pages trimmed just for the perfect quote. This? This is my love language. Forget touch, acts od service or whatever. Just send me your book quotes! Ah! Speaking of – I have a folder in my phone gallery with almost (checking in disbelief…) 800 book pages photos, titled “books 2026” haha. My friend once saw it and said oh my gosh you are an original large language model :D Yes, yes I am. I just started my book nr 50 this year. Right now I’m fully in Stephen King’s short stories (Shawshank Redemption – aaaah clutch to the chest kind of book omg! When he finds the letter under the stone?! I gasped and then obviously took a picture trimmed a quote and sent it immediately to the friend who recommended it to me.) Wow what a magical thing to be grabbed like THAT by some letters on a paper, written by a stranger, don’t you think? Magic, pure magic.
Just discovered this site which is both very clever and useful for finding other books you may enjoy. https://myninebooks.com/
Ha. I’m English, I had a dreadful time at work last week, and I literally ate a camembert out of the box on Friday night. #nailed it
yes!!!
I recently read Land by Maggie O’Farrell and oh my word, it immediately entered my top 5. Not sure which book it unseated but I love it so much. I’ve already purchased it to send to a friend and will be getting another copy for a book exchange I’m hosting for one of my book clubs.
I agree with you – life changing in a way. But reading Land just opened up something… the way she wrote about the horror without showing us anything, just showing that a village once had 20 cabins but now only three because everyone else starved to death, wow. How lucky are we to live in the times of Maggie O’Farrell!
Once I walked into my daughter’s room to find her crying. I asked what was wrong and she said “just sitting in my sad.” No hiding her feelings, no denial, no jokes, no anger at being caught in a private moment. It was true and it was beautiful.
Cup of Jo posts about books are my favorite. Can I recommend This Beautiful Land written by the journalist Evan Gershkovich. I listened and he is the narrator. Also I am recommending I NEVER KNEW YOU AT ALL. This is written by Cup of Jo contributor Christine Pride. I got an advance copy and it is FANTASTIC. https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/I-Never-Knew-You-At-All/Christine-Pride/9781668033258
I’ve had this book in my “to read” pile for ages and have tagged it “COJ” so I’ve definitely heard about it in the comment section here :) I’m even more curious about it now!
I’ve just finished “The things we never say” by Elizabeth Strout, probably one of the best of her novels I’ve read. Currently I’m reading “Klara and the Sun” by Kazuo Ishiguro and loving it. I’ve had my share of dystopian novels this year (I’ve read “I, who have never known men”, reread “The animal farm” and “The plot against America”), so I why not Klara and the sun? :)
I’m reading “The Unselected Journals” of Emma M. Lion by Beth Brower. I bought and read the first volume and then immediately went back to the bookstore for the other 7 volumes (a treat for my own birthday month). I’m now on volume 6. I love this series so much, they are like a spark of sunshine amid my usual reads (classics, history, memoirs, non-fiction).
Respectfully, Joanna, I’m going to have to ask you to stop the book posts. Every time there’s a post, I add loads of books to my want to read list, and it’s now unmanageable! :D
Same! It makes my TBR list formidable! They bring true delight!
I just finished this book last night and I LOVED IT so much!
I could read a thousand of your book recommendations, Joanna, thank you for taking my mind on a much needed walk daily here on CupofJo, and especially, for these types of posts. Beautiful.
I loved this book, but it often felt like a gut punch. So beautifully written and real. Same with Switzy. It was so well done, but so hard for me to read. They make you feel TOO MUCH and sometimes I can’t handle that and need a thriller haha.
I feel this way about Catherine Newman books. Like they’re too real – I have to keep putting it down for a few days and reading something else before I will pick it back up and read just one more chapter and the whole cycle repeats. It takes me such a long time to read one of her books, but I love them!
Absolutely loved this one! I copied so many quotes into my journal ❤️
I loved this book. And after it I read “The Wren, the Wren” by Anne Enright, which I loved just as much
thanks for the rec!
LOL British people saying no….those answers are also so Canadian hahahahaaa
And so Connecticut!
Haha and Minnesotan
I was going to comment this!!
I have! And absolutely loved it. I’ve recently learnt about the genre ‘compassionate realism,’ which encompasses writers like Elizabeth Stroud, Catherine Newman, John Boyne and definitely, I feel Susie Boyt. I feel like this genre was made for me! And as an avid reader, I’d love anymore recommendations.
oh I didn’t know that, and I love the name of the genre!
Maybe you’d like Switzy…really well written but sad
At long last, I’ve picked up Daphne du Maurier’s Rebecca, and while I am kicking myself for not having read it ages ago, I’m also glad to have some perspective and maturity that I didn’t as a younger women. It perfectly captures the discomfort of moving between socioeconomic groups – the unintended faux pas, the insecurity, the ignorance of expectations common to the other. Though released in 1938 and revolving around the British upper class, it provides an excellent vantage point into some of our contemporary American struggles.
One of my all time favorites!
I am currently reading it (about 3/4 done) and I love it! I’m definitely going to be looking for other Daphne DuMaurier books.
My favorite Daphne DuMaurier is A House on the Strand. It has a time travel element!
It’s an amazing, awe-inspiring, stays-with-you book. I plan to reread it in a year or so.
I adored this book. I won’t be able to put into words what it meant to me. It’s funny that its Britishness was what struck you Joanna, as an Australian I barely noticed it, but the thing I won’t forget was the depiction of the grandmother stepping in when her child is an addict. And her love for her daughter through it all even though it’s such a mess. I think this is probably a reasonably common dynamic in families touched by addiction (as mine is) but don’t remember coming across it in a book or film or show before. Beautiful.
I just requested a copy from the library. Looking forward to reading it. I just finished “The Signal Flame” by Andrew Krivak which I really loved. It’s in the style of Kent Haruf, whose novels “Plainsong” and “Eventide” are potentially my all-time favorite books in the whole world. Reading “Shuggie Bain” right now, which is hard, but captivating.
Rachel I had to reply. Another Kent Haruf fan here. Plainsong, Benediction and Eventide are right at the top of my list of perfect novels.
Couldn’t agree more about Kent Haruf. Another writer within the genre of compassionate realism.
Rachel, I share your admiration of Kent Haruf’s writing; he certainly had a way with words. I remember one review I read said that he writes so vividly of an evening on the Plains of Colorado, that it makes the reader want to reach for a sweater.
Our Souls At Night is one of my favourite books. The dialogue is perfection. Do the kids still say ‘Don’t sleep on this?” Anyway, don’t sleep on this.
Have you read “Stones for Ibarra” or “Consider this, Senora” by Harriet Doerr? She published her first novel at the age of 74, which is astonishing and all those kinds of wow-words. But it also meant that she wasn’t able to write as many books as I would have like to have read. Don’t sleep on those either!
I am reading Switzy, which was recommended by you, and I am stunned by how much Emma Cline seems to understand David’s condition and to segue between lucidity and loss. The book u recommending today I like the sample about a book and bed. We all have to figure out what works for us.
Thank you! this looks great. Does anyone know whose painting was used for the cover art? Curious!
It’s by Chantal Joffe. I love it so!
Not sure which painting it is but the artist is Chantal Joffe!
Thank you Anna!
Thanks for identifying the artist. Just visited Chantal Joffe’s website. Just wonderful portraits, as on the cover.
I loved and felt the ending of this book so much, I couldn’t talk about it right away. I read it a year ago after Jenny recommended it —yes! that Jenny from Dinner: A Love Story. I was very excited to see it posted here and to read what you had to say about it, I knew it would be insightful.
I just read another of Jenny’s recommendations: A Town Like Alice, by Nevil Shute. Loved it, and I can’t stop thinking about it.
For those who want more, Susie Boyt’s new book, All Being Well, will be published next year.
“People don’t stop living just because they are dead.” This is exactly what I needed to read today. This morning I watched via livestream a grad school classmate of mine give the eulogy for her own young daughter. I was absolutely floored by her composure and how she filled the room with laughter. And her sons were able to watch their mother stand up to talk, cry, and laugh in front of their loving community after the most immense loss – knowing they will all be okay. I am in awe.
I loved this book so much. May have to reread it now! Speaking of running through the storm and not avoiding the tough parts of life how amazing is this speech addressing the news coming out of Cornell by the headmaster of an all boy’s school? https://royalstgeorgescollege.substack.com/p/a-commitment-to-not-remain-silent made me cry.
Thank you for sharing this important speech. I applaud the headmaster’s moral clarity. We need more of it in this world. I hope the young men have truly listened and learned.
Oh thank you for sharing this! I’ve been talking with my 11-year old boy about all this, Cornell and more broadly, how we/he guard our own humanity in standing up for others. I am going to share this with him too. This addresses so much of what we’ve been discussing.
Thank you for sharing the address. I also found myself crying – a great deal! Maybe the tears come from the possibility of heroics simply becoming human.
Thank you so much for sharing this Thea. It gives me hope. I also found these two articles hopeful. https://www.goodgoodgood.co/articles/cornell-university-jane-doe-student-government https://www.washingtonpost.com/style/2026/10/10/after-cornell-these-dads-are-urging-other-dads-talk-their-sons/
Would anyone here be willing to send this link to Kate Manne, philosophy professor at Cornell and outspoken feminist, who has written extensively (in her substack and in larger media outlets) about the situation there? I am older and not on any social media, so I don’t know how to send her the link to Headmaster Beatty’s speech. I think she would be interested in reading it.
Hey Anon, I left the link on a comment on one of Kate’s recent posts. So hopefully she’ll see it:) Thea thank you so much for sharing this. It made me cry as well. Nicole, I too have been talking to my 12 year old boy about this. I’m going to email this speech to his school.
As an avid reader, I am truly curious to know how others fit in reading time. I unfortunately have to drive most places (most places I go are about a 30-40 min trip in serious traffic) and hate audiobooks being interrupted by GPS so usually reserve drives for podcasts or fun Spotify playlists. At home, it’s groceries, make dinner, do laundry, spend time with my husband and barely enough to time file my nails or stop at the dry cleaners. I tend to read a LOT more while traveling (on planes, on beaches, etc), but my day to day life makes it hard to fit it in when I’m also trying to fit in talking to friends, doing hobbies, being physically active, caring for pets/kids/etc. Do you just not watch TV at all? We might watch about 45 min a night to wind down, which COULD be spent reading but I prefer Big Bang Theory on the couch while my husband rubs my feet lol. I’m so curious how most people make more time for reading. I have tried to do it at lunchtime (haha, when I get one- I work in healthcare), but that even feels unsatisfying. Help!
My answer is not watching TV. I get maybe an hour at the end of the day after the kids are in bed and we’ve eaten/picked up a bit, and most nights I choose to read for that hour. Sometimes I do watch a show instead, but I’ve been able to read 40 books this year so far mainly just with that one hour before bed. Having such limited free time, I personally feel like TV is generally a waste of that time, but it’s totally fine to feel differently! just a personal preference.
I hear you Melanie (Melanie here as well) – I work full time, 2 kids, workout an hour a day, run my house yada yada. For me, it’s just always having a book handy. Not waiting for the delightful hour+ to read but fit in the 10 minutes here and there – then on weekends I try to spend real time reading (some times in the sauna, some times when kids play nearby) but for me this means I generally read about 2 books a month. and the months I don’t because we’re rewatching New Girl because we need the laughs, so be it.
Hi, Melanie. I have a 35 minute commute, two school age boys, a full time job, dog, husband, volunteering etc. I read before bed when I am not spending time w/hubby or watching tv before bed. I also read on the weekends while my kids frolic. While I have tea and they pummel each other on the couch I read. while i watch for cars while they bike I read. at playgrounds, while they read manga, while they watch tv, etc.
Hi Melanie – I hear you! Sometimes I run out of underwear because I literally do not have time to move clothes to the dryer – there is just too much to do. That being said, I have a couple of thoughts for you! One is, turn off the sound on your GPS. Most of the time we basically know the route anyway, so the constant interruptions from GPS are really not needed. Then it could be a great time to listen to an audiobook. Also — and this I know from when I have a book I just can’t put down — you might have to switch out the TV time for reading. Which leads to my next rec, which is to seek out books that just GRAB you so you WANT to read them instead of watching TV. And last rec is, schedule reading time into your days off! There are basically unlimited chores/activities you could do on a given day, so just decide that you can’t possible do all of it and choose an hour or two to hide your phone, go somewhere pleasant, and just read!
While eating breakfast? Waiting in line, or for appointments. Maybe just a chapter a night before falling asleep? Can you carve out an hour or two on weekends as a regular way to treat yourself? Sounds like you have a full life of good things, so maybe it’s just fine not to read as much in this particular season.
I usually read 50-100 books a year, and the short answer is that I basically don’t watch tv or social media. I hate how pretentious that sounds, but I’d just rather read a book. Often I’ll cuddle on the couch with my husband while he watches tv and I read, so we still get the time together. The years with fewer books are directly related to him finding tv shows that appeal to me :P Another tip is to use Libby on your phone and use it as a replacement for other phone scrolling. I like it when I need to wait in lines, etc. I also consider it a hobby. When I find myself with a free couple of hours on the weekend, I plant myself with a book. My husband on the other hand reads just 5-10 minutes each night when he gets into bed. Reading half a chapter a day still finishes a book! Audiobooks: I do a few. I like them for my kid’s sports practices because I can be entertained while still watching the practice. I used to have a long, mostly gridlocked freeway commute that burned through audiobooks, but I agree I can’t do them while doing errands. (I don’t usually use a GPS, but I am still too distracted.) A friend does tons of audiobooks while doing chores or hobbies but I can’t focus on both at the same time, lol.
Sorry one more thought! If part of the fun of chilling with your husband and watching a show is the bonding time, maybe propose a reading night to him. Every once and a while my wife and I will get in bed right after the kids go down and just read our books together. We share random thoughts that come to us, read funny or interesting lines out loud – kind of like cuddling in front of a show, but books instead.
One thing I have found effective is to have a book with me at almost all times. Whether it’s a physical book or a book on my kindle app on my phone, if I have it with me then I can use the waiting minutes to read (instead of, for me, scrolling my phone). Even in a busy day, there’s a fair bit of waiting – for water to boil for dinner, for the dog to find the perfect spot in the yard, for someone to get in the car for a ride home…those minutes add up! But I do think the right book is important for waiting minutes. I can’t read something super deep and thought provoking because it’s too hard to get in and out of in a 3 minute time frame. But there are plenty of books that are great (maybe even better!) in 3 minute increments.
Just hear to say that I basically didn’t have any hobbies for the years when my kids were little little. Then my youngest turned four and I wasn’t needed EVERY SECOND in the same way, and lo and behold, I have time for hobbies- reading!- again!
When I went digital, I began reading SO MUCH MORE. I have the Libby app and I will often download the same book in both book and audiobook version. I listen to it while driving, and then when I’m waiting for something or sitting a child’s practice I will switch back to reading it on the app. I read at night next to my kids when they require my presence to fall asleep and when I would otherwise resent them for intruding upon my “me” time. I catch little reading breaks when waiting to pick up my carpool or sitting in a waiting room. My favorite thing of all time – my happy place – is firing up my audiobook and heading into Costco with earbuds firmly in place. I also listen to audiobooks while doing chores. Years ago I read about incentive bundling (doing a chore alongside something you enjoy) and once I could bundle reading into washing dishes and folding laundry it made those tasks way less painful!
Great question. I allow my audiobooks to be interrupted by GPS though it irritates me too. I usually select an audiobook that is more easily interruptable, like a non-fiction easy reader, a humor book (I’m listening to John Hodgman’s Medallion Status right now), or a romance book. No mystery in the car, too much going on. However, I also sneak in a page or two whenever I can (toilet, a down minute while waiting for my child to put on shoes, etc.) I usually have several books going at a time in order to make sure I can leave copies around the house. I rarely have luxuriant reading time (anything more than 10 uninterrupted minutes is pretty glorious with two kids under 4) but when I do, I soak those up. I also probably get to watch an hour of tv at night with my husband after the kids go to bed, so I haven’t sworn off TV. Good luck to us all!
Melanie, Tell us what authors, genres, titles you have enjoyed, and what medium? This hive can likely recommend a winner for you that you download or purchase, or borrow from the library. The tangible book might make you prioritize scheduling a reading window. Or better yet, steal some time to yourself and enjoy that glimmer!
What worked for me is joining a book club- one that started from a Minneapolis house tour post here (thanks Julia for organizing!) In the year before I joined I had read one or two books but now I read 12-18 a year. Leaving the house to spend an evening chatting with lovely smart women and eating delicious food is such a treat. I’ve come across so many great book recommendations from Book Club, most recently “The Isle in the Silver Sea.” Highly recommend!
I want to add to my previous comment. I do pay someone to clean my house once a month so the time that I would otherwise be changing my sheets, I read. Also, I do not bother separating my colors from my lights in laundry and my husband does about half of the housework and childcare.
The issue for me isn’t finding things I want to read or like to read. I use my library card frequently, I just find I have a really hard time squeezing in reading. I know where there is a will there is a way, so I just need to MAKE time. Husband and I both love to read but just struggle to find the time. My weekends are jam packed (I’m a competitive equestrian), it is highly normal for me to roll out of the house by 6am on weekend mornings and get home just in time to throw something together for dinner, take a shower, and crash lol. Some really good suggestions here, and I will be trying to implement a few of them because when I DO have guilt free spare time on my hands, I know I could be more intentional with it. :)
Pre-toddler, I used to read 50-60 books a year and now I’m “down” to 30-40. As others have mentioned, the trick is really to read in bits and pieces here and there– during all those short, in-between times. I hate this for my brain, because I’m a sink-into-a-book-for-three-hours type of person, but I’ve found this is the only way. Keeping my Kindle in my purse at all times is really helpful even though I love a good “real” book but if I have 10-15 minutes waiting in my car before an appointment, I can easily read (picking the e-reader over my phone is the trick though). I read Loved and Missed this way and even though I sooo wanted to sit down and spend a few hours with it, it’s just not possible in this season of life.
Have you read this essay by Pandora Sykes? https://pandorasykes.substack.com/p/but-how-do-you-read-so-much It very much describes how I feel about reading day-to-day (even though I don’t read quite as much as her)
@melanie, you have a full schedule! I feel like I’ve learned with kids that you just have to prioritize what you want to do. I prioritize reading but I wish I had time for my othrr
@melanie, whoops sent too soon! I wish I had time for other hobbies! You have to pick and chose when you have little time. One other thought about audiobooks, I feel like there is a learning curve when you first start listening to them. It took me a month or so to feel like I could really truly follow them. So, maybe give audiobooks another shot! You might be able to follow them better than you think. I also have my phone connected to my car via Android Auto and it makes skipping back super easy and not distracting when driving. I just hit the skip back 15 seconds button if I miss something important in the book.
I’m also a parent with three kids and a healthcare job, and read 1-2 books a week. Ditto to just not watching TV. I love TV, but I love reading more. I don’t think there’s anything superior about reading vs watching TV, just figure out what you value most! Also seconding the suggestion to take your book with you whenever you read the house, and pull it out instead of your phone for those “lost” moments of the day. I also read in the morning before anyone is up instead of looking at my phone. Good luck!!
Like others here, it’s when I started reading ebooks on Libby and Hoopla (through my local library) that my reading-for-pleasure skyrocketed. I love reading a print book, but it’s more of a luxury these days. An ebook I can read while my kids take a bath (in the bathroom with them, without worrying about water splashing the pages), while my youngest nurses to sleep, while I’m standing idly stirring the pasta sauce. I guess I could do all that with a print book, but I’d have to probably throw the phone into the sea. Which maybe I should!
This book is a miracle. Touched me and many in my life — namely women of all different ages — deeply.
I’ve read this twice, so moving–especially in ‘later mid-life’. In this genre, Kate Atkinson’s new one, Our Noble Selves, is deadpan, wry and historically-rooted.
I loved this book. I think I found it after Catherine Newman recommended it, of course, I knew it would be special. Funnily enough, maybe because I’m not American, it didn’t strike me as particularly British !
Among my favorites in recent years! Growing up with a British grandmother and my half British mother (who, though being raised in America, is way easier understand of when I think of her as British), I adored the Englishness of this book and characters. And the gorgeous title comes to me regularly as I think about different people in my life.
I loved this book too. I appreciate its depiction of how “love” can look so different in times of distress and duress — what does it mean to love her daughter in this situation? To love her granddaughter? Will every action look loving? A very complicated and beautiful novel
Did anyone else find their way to this book after it was name dropped in the Netflix adaptation of Vladimir?? (I can’t remember if they also reference it in the novel Vladimir…) Just came up on my Libby, excited to read.
I had read it before watching Vladimir but was thrilled to learn they had referenced it there. Just like the book struck a chord with me, Vladimir did as well.
I’ve read this book but ages ago and now this makes me want to go straight back and reread it – thank you! All her books are wonderful – including her memoir about loving Judy Garland (and I’m not a musicals person at all!) She used to write a glorious column in the FT and I was always photographing paragraphs to send to friends… she just has such a great way of putting things.
so curious to check out the memoir!
I read Loved and Missed on the recommendation of a friend a few years ago and loved it. It’s undersung but I keep seeing it get passed hand to hand like this which gives me hope!
A truly exquisite book. I read it ages ago, but still think about it all the time.
This has been on my TBR for ages after several rave reviews from friends. Just checked it out on Libby to read this weekend.
I love every single one of those lines. Will definitely seek out this book. The photographed paragraphs made me smile. I send my daughter photos of book lines / paragraphs. The lines about funding joy are so great. Will use that in cards for friends’ birthdays etc. Source quoted of course ! I’ve been including Mary Oliver’s ” Joy is not made to be a crumb ” in cards lately. The line about the ” friend of a friend ” is hilarious. I like the British “no” guy too ! Funny. Thank you for all of this !
That reel was painfully accurate…. all except for calling it a calendar! I hear “diary” far more often. It’s hard as an outsider to know where you stand in these situations.
Are you all aware that the author’s great grandfather is Sigmund Freud and her father is the painter Lucian Freud? Some lineage!!
Very interesting tidbit! I just went down a rabbit hole and realized that Lucian fathered 14 children, I don’t know why I thought it was only a few. But this makes Susie and Bella Freud half sisters. Am a big fan of Bella Freud’s podcast Fashion Neurosis, even though I’ve heard her talk about her family before on the podcast I never realized how complicated her family actually is. I’m curious to check out this novel, love a book that is so very particular English in its quirks and language.
yup this is a real treasure, i tell everyone about it everywhere i go! glad you got to experience it
This book is AMAZING. Floored me! Beautiful book.
you just want to clutch it to your chest!
This is one of my favorite books! I read it last summer and when I finished it, I immediately started reading it again. Such heart and humor and tenderness in that book!